Violaceous

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Los Angeles, August 2012

 

 

“What am I gonna do with you, huh? Tell me.”

“…I really don’t know how to answer that.”

“Yeah… I bet you don’t.”

Alecia snorted and took a sip of her beer – gulping it down straight from the bottle like the natural, modern-time pirate she was. Then she burped loudly and sunk back into Lisa’s plush couch, her feet propped up, on the coffee table. Her military boots thrown on the floor and forgotten for the time being.

Lisa smiled. She loved how comfortable her friend could get in her presence because that same ease reverberated back to her. And hell, did she need some reprieve at the moment!

“So… how long is it, again? Remind me, please.”

“Seventy-six days. And a few hours.”

“Dang.” Another long drag from her bottle. “Have you truly been counting?”

Lisa laughed dryly.

“Of course. How could I not? It’s not like he’s the kind of guy you don’t notice is missing.”

“Right… That’s Mr. Jackson’s magic, I guess. You hinted at it several times through the years, but we never really elaborated. For basic decency. Oh, and about that… how long since you… ya know…”

“Same thing. Seventy-six days. I didn’t do it with anybody else, obviously… since Michael and I have been… on stand-by.”

Leish gasped.

“Over two months without sex? That’s horrifying!”

“Yeah, no shit!”

Lisa too sank back into her armchair, facing her best friend and just staring at her for a moment without saying a word. It was not needed. She and Alecia understood each other perfectly, and Lisa was glad she had someone to count on given what was happening. Which was nothing like the horrible issues she and Michael had faced in the past, all things considered, but still obnoxious. She knew that relationships had to be looked at as a constantly evolving entity, but sometimes she wished she and her husband had managed to grow up just a tiny bit more since they had gotten married for the second time.

Oh, well. There was still room to maneuver themselves into better days, that was for sure. She had learned that too, since she and Michael had finally gotten back together for good. They had at least been able to get rid of the old negativity… and the dangerous outsiders, too.

And to think there had been a point when she had almost convinced herself that it would never happen again! That she and Michael would never get back what they once had, and that she would end up staying married to what she had understood was nothing but a parasitic being who was subtly trying to suck her dry. Twat. But going through the motions was a bitch, and she had found herself trapped in a messy relationship that had almost dragged her under.

Only, then Michael had almost died and her world had threatened to crumble and slide into the darkness with him.

A little over three years earlier, he had ended up in the hands of a scumbag of a doctor who had about killed him with a nearly fatal dose of medication. At that time, Michael was about to start a residency show in London and had been beyond stressed out. Exhausted, under extreme pressure, and with nobody to take care of him properly. He had felt lonely and, at times, backed into a corner. His insomnia had kicked in like crazy and had been worse than usual. He felt he had no one to turn to and had taken the only help that was offered. He couldn’t imagine that he would end up almost losing his life in the process.

When the shit had hit the fan, when he had slipped into a coma for a little less than a week, Lisa had been beyond herself. Trapped as she had been in a loveless marriage, she had been unable to worry about anything and anyone else for several months. Then, news about Michael had broken and her plans of having kids with the man she was married to had come to a sudden, screeching halt – which, in hindsight and given what had happened next, had been a miraculous occurrence. But, at the time, she had felt miserable and hopeless.

What had happened to Michael had been the straw able to break the camel’s back, and the ultimate shock she needed to jump back onto her feet. She had managed to have her then-husband served with divorce papers so fast that his head was probably still spinning, and then she had bolted, hopping onto a plane from the UK to Los Angeles, wanting to be near the only man she truly loved. The man she still was in love with and probably would never stop being in love with, no matter what. At that point in time, she had already come to accept that pesky fact, but she hadn’t acted upon it. She had merely been reacting to it by pretending her feelings weren’t there.

Something that was no longer feasible when she realized that their lives weren’t eternal and that she could have lost Michael forever. At least in this time – and on this plane of existence.

Regardless of what would happen with him, regardless if they would ever get back together or not, suddenly she had known what to do. She needed to get rid of people who had no business being around her and be the best version of herself when around Michael. For Michael.

The problem? He wasn’t even awake yet and, obviously, had no idea of her plans. As far as he knew, they were done – finished as a couple. They had exhausted all their possibilities. That was the conundrum she had found herself face to face with, once her plane landed in the city of angels. A place that was toxic and detrimental on so many levels.

As a matter of fact, when she had finally arrived at the hospital she wasn’t even sure Michael would end up wanting her there. She had found Janet in a private area near his room, and at first the atmosphere in the room had been awkward. She and Lisa had been so close in the past, but that friendship too had been lost along the way. However, Lisa had informed Katherine – to whom she was still pretty close – about her intentions of visiting Michael in person.

“Hey…” Without any more words, Janet had simply walked over and had taken Lisa into her arms, holding onto her. Lisa could tell from the look on her face, from her tired eyes, how worried about her big brother she was.

“Hey… How is he?”

“He’s hanging on…”

“Can I see him?”

“Yes… He’s still… asleep… but I’m sure he would love to know you’re here. And I’m sure he’ll feel your presence.”

Seeing Michael motionless in that bed had pretty much crushed her. Lisa had felt gutted, her knees giving in and, in the hours that had followed, she had just sat there by his side holding his hand. She had also had plenty of time to think about the countless memories she shared with him. Everything had taken a new angle. All the pain she had endured – that they both had endured – had been worth it, now that she was finally able to accept the astonishing amount of happiness she had experienced with him. An emotional intoxication – in the best way – she had never felt before or after.

For a handful of days she had rarely left that hospital room, except for a few hours of absence spent at a nearby hotel to take a shower and change her clothes. His silence and stillness had given her all the time and space to evaluate the situation and think about what would have happened, had he just passed away. Lisa couldn’t even bring herself to go there – such was the pain she felt.

And eventually, he had awakened.

Instant relief. The weight of the entire world was being lifted from her shoulders. She finally could breathe oxygen after being trapped underwater for what felt like forever.

Of course, being the unpredictable individual that he was, Michael had decided to wake up the only time she had fallen asleep in her hotel room. She had passed out on her bed after a long shower, only to open her eyes again ten hours later. God damn it!

When Lisa had returned to the hospital, Michael was sitting up in his bed, looking very calm and maybe a bit remote. For a few days, he had suffered from what the doctors called a state of post-traumatic amnesia, which made him feel a bit disoriented. Understandably so.

The point was that he didn’t act as if he was confused at all, and in fact he had held out his hand to her the moment he had spotted her among his family members. He had also looked slightly taken aback when tears had welled up in her eyes, as if he couldn’t really understand why she was crying.

Lisa hadn’t been able to say a word.

Later that evening, she had been allowed to spend the night in his room, taking turns with Katherine and Rebbie. Michael certainly was fine with it, and had dozed off pretty early, leaving her once again alone to think about what was happening and what would happen next.

The following days had been crucial to assessing his state. He was, in essence and all things considered, a pretty healthy guy. He didn’t have any permanent damage to any of his organs, his brain worked just fine. He had also started talking again almost immediately and was perfectly lucid.

“Do you remember anything about what happened?”

“You mean while I was… asleep?”

Or right before falling into that damn coma? Lisa had just shrugged her shoulders. He could take her question the way he wanted. She didn’t intend to be pushy at all. Not anymore.

“I don’t know. It felt like watching the same movie over and over again… only, every time there was some new detail I hadn’t spotted before. The movie was about me. It was my life, but in a way I had never seen it.” He had chewed at the inside of his cheek, his eyes downcast. “It felt very real, Lisa. It was almost as if it wasn’t a dream at all, and I was just trapped there. In some sort of loopy, alternate reality.”

She had stared at him. His cheeks were stubbly, his hair a mess. He looked the same way he had always looked, and she wanted with everything she had for him to feel better again. As soon as possible. Whatever the cost.

“At some point I remember I was on a beach. I don’t know where. I was walking right along the line where the water meets the sand and the sky wasn’t exactly blue… It was purple, with big, fluffy white clouds at the horizon. A purple sky…” He had squinted his eyes, and she could tell that he struggled to find the word he wanted to use in that specific context. She had always found his elaborate vocabulary one of his most enticing traits, and it pained her to see him wrestle with his own mind.

“…No, wait… that’s not it. Not purple. It was more like… lilac. Violaceous. The sky, that is.” He had glanced up at her and their eyes had met. “You get what I mean, right?”

“Violaceous. I think so, yeah.”

“And you were there too, right in front of me. But you were walking too fast, and I struggled to keep up the pace… It was… odd.”

It was odd, indeed. She had felt the same way countless times in the past. Struggling to keep his pace. For a very long time, she had felt as if he was constantly miles ahead and she would never be able to reach him.

“Lise…”

“Yes, Michael?”

“Am I still dreaming? I mean, right now? Am I asleep and I don’t realize it?”

Suddenly, he looked and sounded confused. Her eyes had fluttered closed and she had physically felt pain in her heart.

“No. You’re awake now, baby. And everything is going to be OK.”

She hadn’t even cared about using that sweet term of endearment, because it was the truth. She felt that way about him and was tired, exhausted, to pretend she didn’t.

And that had been the start of their new cycle. Or maybe the end of the previous one. All that mattered was that Michael had ended up making a full recovery pretty quickly and that, in the end, had been utterly unaffected by his coma. However, his life had changed and taken a whole new direction. Something that Lisa probably hadn’t been expecting.

First of all, he delayed the shows and renegotiated his contract, settling for about a total of twenty performances. Not one more, not one less. No exceptions, no buts, no re-dos. Contrary to the fears that had plagued him before his coma, he hadn’t experienced any financial setbacks and, in fact, his business had flourished after a series of well-thought accessory business deals.

Then, once he was done with that temporary residency in London, he was also done with the music business altogether. At least as a performer. Behind the scenes, he still liked to take care of production and mentoring, and he sometimes would sing a bit – on other artists’ records. He had flown back to Los Angeles and, in a surprise move that shocked everyone, he had also gone back to Neverland. He had taken possession of his land again, despite all the people who had tried so hard to taint it. Of course, just like in the past he didn’t really live there and mostly stayed at his Hideout, but it was nice to know that, somehow, his almost-afterlife experience had caused him to look at previous events with a different mindset.

And throughout it all, he and Lisa had slowly but steadily found their rhythm again. Being just friends at first, but spending a lot of time together, finding every excuse to meet. Mostly, being finally able to talk about stuff that had remained unsaid for far too long.

They had done so in a new way. More honest and raw, and certainly way more open than in the past. Their brush with permanent loss had shocked them back to an intense willingness to no longer let go of what had always been worth their commitment. They had both changed – or, more appropriately, evolved in the same direction.

Unsurprisingly and in a way that seemed very much predestined, their friendship had morphed into something else pretty quickly and, before they knew what was happening, they were making love again for the first time in years. It hadn’t even been about falling in love all over again, because their mutual feelings had never changed. They had never fallen out of love with each other. At one point, they had simply stopped talking about it – both thinking it was pointless – and tried to move on regardless of their feelings.

Lisa had thought to be dying and resurrecting at the same time when he first took her again. Just holding onto him, her fingers buried in his hair as he languidly moved inside her, stroking all her cords – physical, mental, emotional. Just drowning in his eyes, which were vulnerable, unguarded. Open and staring back at her. His eyes were the same as they had been when she had first fallen in love with him.

It was as if he was looking at her for the very first time, seeing the most intimate part of who she was, and that had been her capitulation. That, together with the fact that she had almost lost him for good. Now, every instant had immense value. Every kiss, every action, every word counted.

A couple of months later – and a lot of lovemaking later – she became pregnant. Totally by accident. An unexpected glory – and the ultimate triumph.

Michael had immediately moved to Hidden Hills with the kids, not wanting to ever lose sight of Lisa – and their baby. Of course, they both had been over the moon when they had found out they were expecting a child, and their happiness had multiplied tenfold when they had discovered that they would be having twins. Two little girls were on their way, ready to brighten up their parents’ lives with their mere presence. The living, breathing symbols of a profound and sincere love destined to never vanish.

Michael and Lisa’s wedding – their second and last one – had been celebrated before Mia and Ella were born. Just a small, intimate and yet utterly beautiful ceremony in the greenery of Neverland. Even Priscilla had been invited, and quite uncharacteristically, she seemed to have made peace with whatever grudge she had been holding onto when it came to her son-in-law. Maybe seeing her daughter miserable and on the point of shattering into a thousand pieces had finally done the trick.

A little over a year after Michael had almost lost his life, his entire existence – and Lisa’s – had taken an entirely new dimension. A perfect one.

And now, they were once again separated. It was nothing serious, Lisa knew that, but it upset her nonetheless. For the past two months, Michael had stayed at his Hideout while she kept living at Hidden Hills, the house they had chosen once again after remarrying. To not have him around felt weird, it didn’t matter how many times he showed up to spend time with the children. She missed his presence next to her, wanted to find his warm body and hold onto it at night, needed to wake up next to him in the morning and cuddle with him before they started their day. She just wanted things to go back to that normality she adored.

“Hey, Lise.”

Leish’s voice brought her back to the present.

“What?”

“I think it’s a little too long and a little too much.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You and Michael. I mean… this sorta-kinda separation. I mean, it’s really dumb if you really think about it.”

She was right. It was very dumb. Especially since, as Lisa had pointedly remembered, they both had in fact evolved. But some things just seemed to never change, and being feisty and intense in their relationship was one of them. It came with the good – with long, intense sessions of sexual healing and countless soul-searching conversations that would make them feel replenished and seen and heard – and the bad – with stupid fights and an old, never tamed stubbornness.

“We’re not really separated. We’re just taking a break…”

“From one another?”

Lisa had to laugh at the shocked expression on her friend’s face. As if she and Carey didn’t fight like cats and dogs at times. They just had a different way of handling that aspect of their marriage, that was all.

“Yeah. So it’s still fresh and amazing when we finally get back together.”

“So it’s gonna happen.” Her eyebrows sprung up and she stared at Lisa with her feline gray eyes. “You’re gonna get back together.”

“Oh, yeah. Definitely.”

Yes, definitely. Lisa had no doubt about that, and it certainly was a huge step forward compared to the past. She only had to break from the impasse that had been plaguing her for weeks, preventing her from taking that last tiny step back to Michael. And into his arms.

“Besides, Leish… It’s not that we don’t see each other. He comes over every single day to see the kids. He never, ever misses it. So I can’t say he’s absent from our lives or anything. He and I just don’t talk much about what is going on and he… well…” She just shook her head, feeling utterly powerless despite her casual tone.

“Doesn’t spend the night at home. He goes back to his condo every single time. Right?”

Essentially, yes.

“Yeah. Those are the rules… To vacate the premises until our issues are settled. So we don’t keep getting on each other’s nerves.”

“The rules?” Leish laughed. “Lisa – you don’t do rules. And neither does your hubby.”

“We learned. Believe it or not, we got some. And we manage to make them work.” Lisa shrugged her shoulders even though she was, in fact, quite proud of that specific accomplishment.

“OK, but why? What caused this to go on for over two months? Was the fight so hard to digest? Did he do something… you know… serious?”

“Serious?”

“Yeah. I mean, did he cheat on you or something?”

Lisa rolled her eyes and waved her hand in the air in a dismissive gesture.

“What? No! Hell, no. Thankfully, Mike is not the cheating type.”

No, he wasn’t. When they had broken up in the early two-thousands, he had gone through his slutty phase for a bit, sleeping around and acting like a player, but she knew it hadn’t meant much to him beyond physical release. It had mostly been about trying a new approach with women – a way less emotionally attached one – as he did his best to get over Lisa, knowing she was doing the same. For both, it had also been about fighting off boredom and loneliness. They had talked about it when they had gotten back together. They had acknowledged how painful it had been to see the other act that way. They also had decided that what had happened in the past was no longer important, and they had moved on.

So, no. Other women or lack of love had nothing to do with their latest fight. He just had been a little too absorbed in a new movie project he was working on. Nothing remotely unsurprising to anyone who knew him. He was just committed and relentless, work-wise, in a way that others wouldn’t always understand. However, for the first time in three years, Lisa had felt her old fears creep under her skin. The dread that he would slowly start to slip away like it had happened when they were married the first time. Ending up being too engulfed in whatever was interesting to him at the moment to remember that he had a family waiting for him at home. And then, another ancient fear had joined the team: the idea that he might suddenly be so busy because he needed space from her.

She had told him, and Michael had looked genuinely taken aback. Speechless for quite some time. Eventually, he had just frowned and shaken his head.

“Lisa Marie… are you fucking serious? Do you really mean what you just said? ‘Cause let me tell ya, girl, this really is beyond the pale. Even for your standards.”

He was talking about her reaction – while effectively reacting in a way that had managed to make her even more upset. And so, after a bit of a screaming match, he had packed a couple of bags and left for the Hideout, telling her that he would be back the next day to have breakfast with the children and to spend time with them.

Lisa’s impasse had begun then and there. When she had seen how hurt and confused he so obviously was. And, above all, how serious he was about wanting to step away for a while.

Well, that “while” had become longer and longer, and over two months later Michael still hadn’t come back home on a permanent basis. Of course, she noticed how he would look at her whenever he was at Hidden Hills. As if he was waiting for her to say or do something. And he was right. She did owe him something. She wanted to apologize to him for overreacting, just for starters. But also – first and foremost – she owed him the trust she knew he deserved. She had to have more faith in him, and them as a couple. She never had to forget how much they had gone through to be where they were now, and how important what they had finally been able to build was. Looking deep into herself, she also knew that him working – or overworking – had nothing to do with wanting to step away from her. She had projected her own hang-ups onto him – and had hurt him in the process.

And so, for weeks on end, she hadn’t been able to come up with something good that would be able to fulfill the promise they had made to each other when they had gotten back together, after his coma. Everything had felt… just not enough.

But now she did. Now creativity had finally struck her. She had faltered for a moment, but finally she was back on track.

“Listen, Leish. I didn’t ask you to come to visit just to whine about how lonely I feel without Mike. I mean, I do, but that’s not the point.”

“Then what am I here for, if not for being the shoulder you can cry on?”

“Well… You’re here to help me keep my promise.”

 

 

---

 

 

Later that evening – The Ivy Restaurant, Los Angeles

 

Michael fixed his tie and glanced around before stepping out of the car – even though it wasn’t all that necessary anymore. He was still a very prominent figure worldwide, but pretty much retreating from public performances and appearances and settling down as a family man who worked behind the scenes had changed his life in more ways than one. And for the better, in a phase of his life when he would have probably been swallowed whole by the machine once again. His art – or more specifically, his business – had been on the verge of taking over his entire existence one more time.

Well, no more! All was nicely balanced out now.

Even after over three years, it was shocking to think about how things were now. It all still felt new. His massive community of fans was still very protective of him and more often than not popped up wherever he was, but most of them – albeit not all – seemed to have understood that he needed to be left alone so that he could experience existence in a way that resembled normalcy. Well, at least normalcy for his standards. As a result, he finally managed to have more privacy, to the point that he no longer needed any elaborate – which would often fail, anyway – plan to be out in the world without an army of security all the time.

Like today. No security detail, just he and his driver. Nobody else. It was so quiet and relieving to live like many other human beings…

It was a warm summer evening, although slightly windy, which was nice. And in all frankness, he had initially planned to spend it with the kids, maybe taking them to the ranch to watch some movies in the theater. With a bit of luck, perhaps Lisa would decide to join them and it would be a chance for the two of them to finally talk things through. His little wife seemed to be in dire need of a slight push, that was for sure! However, in the end his plans had completely crashed. Well, not crashed… They had morphed into something different.

The problem was that Michael still had some issues saying no to people, and Alecia had always been so nice to him. He hadn’t expected to be asked out for dinner, but she had told him she needed to talk to him about some business deal, and he didn’t want to let her down. So he had said yes, all in all mildly content to spend the evening with her.

Of course, Alecia was Lisa’s buddy, but through the years he too had become fond of her. She was fun and easygoing and came across as an honest, no-nonsense person. In some ways, she reminded Michael of his wife. A wife he currently missed… a lot. Way more than he was willing to admit to himself – and certainly to said wife.

The upside of having taken on Alecia’s offer was that he wouldn’t have to bump into Lisa at Hidden Hills and pretend to be stern and cold, when inside he felt anything but.

However, despite missing her terribly, he had made up his mind and would not give in or relent. He would offer her some leeway so that she could feel more comfortable finally breaking the barrier that separated them, but he was not going to cave in first. She had totally overreacted and she had to acknowledge it, and if she wanted to be stubborn, then he would let her be stubborn. At least for a little while still. At his age, he no longer wanted to waste too much time on such stupid quarrels.

Glancing around, he was pleased to discover that there were no other cars parked in the private garage – if not those that belonged to the staff. Yes, things had changed, but he still preferred to book the entire restaurant for himself and his guests – just to make sure he would be left alone and do his thing in peace.

He finally got off the car and, for a moment, wondered if he could leave his jacket on the backseats. If his elegant shirt and tie and vest would suffice. It was a stupid thought, but perfect to keep the idea of being at the Ivy, of all places, a bit at arm’s length. That place held way too many memories of his long history with Lisa, and it was such a shame that she wasn’t there. Eventually, he just shook his head to himself, grabbed his jacket from the car and draped it over his arm.

Maurice, the head waiter, smiled at him from the private entrance to the restaurant and opened the glass door for him.

“Mister Jackson. Good evening! It’s so nice to see you again.”

Michael held out his hand to him.

“Good evening. It’s nice to see you too, Maurice. By the way… I am sorry for – you know, the short notice and all.”

“It’s never a problem, sir. You know we are always pleased to have you as our guest.” Maurice began guiding Michael through the private hall leading to the restaurant’s southern wing. The recently renovated one, where the management had recently added a small mahogany stage. Michael and Lisa had already enjoyed some amazing jazz bands there, during their late-night dinners. “Please, say hello to Miss Lisa for me.”

“Oh, sure. I will certainly do.”

“Mr. Jackson… The whole wing is reserved for you and your guest, as per your request. Can I get you anything?”

“White wine, as usual. Thank you, Maurice.”

Michael exhaled and glanced over at his watch. He was slightly early. All of a sudden, and without any apparent reason, his mood kind of dropped. Maybe it had been about hearing Lisa’s name out loud, or perhaps it indeed was about the location. He wasn’t sure why, but as his birthday drew near, he had begun to feel a little depressed. He questioned whether he would reach the age of fifty-four with the darn iron curtain still in place or whether he would finally be permitted to return home.

Man… he truly was getting older. Softer.

Well, technically he knew he could go back to living at Hidden Hills whenever he pleased, but the ball was in Lisa’s court and if she wanted to play the tough game, she had to know she would end up losing. Shaking his head to himself, Michael couldn’t help but notice that they could still be spoiled brats no matter how much they had matured. And stubborn mules, too.

Alecia hadn’t arrived yet, so he just took a minute or two to examine the stage setup. The lights were dimmed down and it looked like a band would be playing tonight. Weird. Maurice hadn’t said a word about it.

“Well, let’s just hope they’re good,” Michael mumbled to himself.

He climbed up the few stairs to the stage and looked around. A standard, bluesy drum set, a couple of guitars, a bass, and even an upright black piano were all neatly placed on the small, wooden floor. A nice, vintage-looking microphone was also there, near a stool. He recognized it right away, although it wasn’t the kind of microphone he would usually choose for himself. It was a classic R84, and he remembered its luscious ribbon sound because he had heard it somewhere at some point in the past. He had just never had the opportunity to try it out personally. What he knew was that such equipment was especially suitable to record or perform stuff with a vintage flavor while, in contrast, Michael’s music had always propelled itself into the future. Almost out of his own volition, he touched the microphone with the back of his fingers, then undid the first button of his shirt, loosening his tie just slightly.

Did he miss the endless hours at the recording studio? Only sometimes, when he felt slightly melancholic. But the truth was that he had given everything he had to that part of his existence, and he loved his new life the way it was. Now, if only every single piece of the puzzle fell into place once again, everything would be just perfect.

Hearing the door open again, he turned and noticed Alecia enter the room while pleasantly chatting with Maurice. She hadn’t dressed up for the night – in fact, she wore black leather pants, combat boots and a black, see-through shirt, her platinum hair short and spiky as usual. Her attire was casual and informal and Michael wondered if maybe he should have avoided the tie. And the vest. And the jacket. Well, it was too late now.

“Hey! There you are!” Alecia opened her arms and jogged in his direction as he walked back down the small steps that kept the stage raised from the floor. “Dang, I made you wait. I am so sorry. I know you don’t like that.”

They hugged for a moment, and Michael smiled.

“Oh no, don’t be sorry. You’re not even late – I’m the one being strangely early. How are you?”

She pulled back but kept her hands on his shoulders, smiling up at him. Dang, she was tiny!

“I’m doing amazing! How’s life treating you, Mike? I haven’t seen you in… hell, forever? … And look at you! You look fantastic!”

“I’m very good, thank you.”

“Oh, and I like your attire a lot.” She smoothed down the satin fabric of his purple vest and vaguely touched his tie. “This is nice too!”

Michael cleared his throat and realized that he was blushing. He loved how spontaneous Alecia always was, even if it made him feel shy sometimes.

“Thank you.”

Once again, her big gray eyes scanned him, making him feel slightly uncomfortable. But not too much, and not in the wrong way.

“Damn. And I absolutely love your new hairdo. You looked exactly the same when I first saw you perform live, back in 1995.” She winked at him. “I was in the audience, you know.”

Instinctively, he reached up and touched the back of his head. This was such a woman thing, to notice that he sported the same short hairstyle he did back then. Minus the graying hair on his temples, of course. That was pretty recent stuff. All of a sudden, he realized that Alecia was right: they hadn’t seen each other in forever. Probably six months or so. And that made her out-of-the-blue call even more unexpected. His suspicious nature kicked in once again and for a second he wondered why he was really there, then he scolded himself and decided to ignore his gut feeling. Leish was one of the good guys, after all.

“Ah, thanks? It’s easy maintenance, I guess. May I offer you a glass of wine?”

She laughed.

“Oh yeah. I’m always up for a drink.”

 

 

---

 

 

They had been sitting at the table for over half an hour, and Leish hadn’t gotten to the point yet. So far, they had only talked about pretty generic stuff – vacations, kids, common acquaintances. Michael wondered why she was taking her sweet time, then realized that maybe she just wanted to catch up with him, given that they usually didn’t spend any time together without Lisa being present. Not everything had to be about business.

And about that…

“Have you seen my wife, as of late?”

He casually threw the question out there, then took a sip of wine to look even more inconspicuous. He still hadn’t touched the delicious appetizers the waitress had served about ten minutes earlier. On the other hand, Alecia’s eyes smiled at him as she bit down on a mozzarella stick. Letting her answer sizzle for a moment.

“I sure did. Just earlier this morning, in fact. We had brunch together.”

Michael decided that he would keep his nonchalant attitude intact.

“Yeah? And what else did you girls do?”

“Oh, you know… Just girlie stuff.”

He had to smile. She was fooling around, as if she already knew why he had asked her about Lisa in the first place. OK… Time to be serious again.

“How did you find her? Was she OK?”

Her eyes seemed to laugh again, but not at him. It was just as if she found the situation somehow amusing.

“Well, as OK as she can be without her husband. She really misses you, you know…”

Whoa! Straight to the point! Michael tilted his head and took a moment to regroup. He should have known that Alecia wouldn’t tip-toe around the matter. She just wasn’t that type of person. On the other hand, he could be very vague as a perfect self-defense mechanism.

“Yeah… I know…” He moved on his seat and sighed. “Hey, I don’t want to sound blunt or anything, but… what about that business deal you wanted to talk to me about?”

“You sure you don’t wanna talk about Lisa some more, first?”

Another full-frontal attack, delivered in the sweetest voice. This time, Michael looked straight at her.

“I take it you know what’s been going on.”

“Oh, you know I know.”

He chuckled. He just couldn’t help it. Her casual attitude made it somehow easier to not take this thing too seriously. And maybe he shouldn’t, regardless of Alecia. After all, he knew that he and Lisa would end up finding their way back to one another again. The time of doubts had long gone, thankfully. At least there was that.

“Well, I don’t think it’s appropriate. Not the fact that you know, I’m fine with you and Lisa sharing this stuff if you feel like it. To talk about her without her being present, I mean. See, in the past I had the horrible idea of discussing our marital problems with people who weren’t part of our relationship…”

Leish laughed.

“Well, unless there’s a threesome going on I am not aware of, only the two of you are part of your relationship!”

Michael smiled and shook his head. He did get her point. One could certainly choose to share some private details with external people – but they had to be the right ones. And Debbie hadn’t been one of them for sure. Probably, as far as Lisa was concerned, Alecia was. And he trusted his wife’s judgment.

“Come on, now. Are you being silly on purpose?”

“Of course. I always am! What I mean is, the difference is that I would never insert myself into your marriage or try to disrupt it.”

Bingo. Michael just nodded, feeling that he didn’t need to add anything. Alecia had gotten the memo. And he had, too.

“Right.”

“Well, at least that’s what I hope you’ll think of me once this dinner is over.”

“…Meaning?”

“Oh, nothing, really. You just have to wait and see.”

The little mischievous sparkle in her eyes gave him pause, and he stared at her for a moment.

“Is there really a business deal we are supposed to talk about? Or it was never your intention to begin with?”

Right on cue, two waiters entered the room with the main courses. Grilled vegetable salad for Michael, mushroom risotto for Leish.

They kept staring at each other quietly – weighing each other like two fighters on a ring – until the waiters left, closing the door behind their shoulders.

Alecia took another sip of her wine, then put the glass down.

“No, there is. I was not shitting you. You remember Lisa and I recorded a song together a few years ago, right?”

Oh, he did, although he wasn’t very familiar with the track itself. Besides, it had happened at a moment when he and Lisa were definitely off. Not really speaking, and certainly not spending time together at all. The whole timespan was blurry in Michael’s mind for obvious reasons. He had so much on his plate back then. There really was none left for trivial stuff like someone else’s new song. Not even Lisa’s.

“Yeah.”

“Right. So I was hoping to have you on my next album. For a duet. I know you’re kinda into that stuff, lately. I’m not asking you to shoot a video with me or anything, but maybe you could direct it… I mean, if you want.”

Michael’s eyes narrowed as he weighed her words. Why did it sound as if she was making up stuff as she went along? Was she being honest or she was just borrowing time?

“Are you for real?”

“Of course! I mean, who wouldn’t want the King of Pop on their record?” Leish smiled sweetly, then became serious again. “Michael, I am not joking. I’d be honored if you wanted to collaborate with me. Would you at least consider it?”

“I don’t know. Do you have something you want me to listen to?”

The lights on the stage began to buzz and they both turned their heads to see what was going on. A couple of dudes were there. All dressed in black, very elegant-looking, middle-aged. Definitely professional musicians. One sat behind the drum set, the other approached the guitar. And then two more guys joined them on the stage. A pianist – and a bass player.

Alecia raised her eyebrows.

“If I got a song for you right here, right now, you mean? No, of course not. This is just a friendly dinner. But there’s definitely something you gotta listen to, tonight.”

Michael’s shoulders relaxed and he tilted his head, unable not to smirk at her. He was finally catching up. This little lady had just fucked him over pretty good – but not in a bad way. Now that he was really starting to guess what was happening, he was only mildly miffed. Not angry at Alecia at all, just a bit shocked that she had been able to draw him into her spiderweb so easily. Had he really become so sloppy? No, not sloppy. He hadn’t been so focused in a long time. His mind was just elsewhere lately, and he never would have guessed he should watch his back from Lisa’s best friend!

Well… it wasn’t that bad, though. As a matter of fact, when Michael saw Lisa appear on stage, he was almost glad he had so easily fallen into Alecia’s trap.

 

 

---

 

 

Lisa was tense, anxious. It wasn’t a surprising feeling per se, as she usually was always nervous before going on stage. However, tonight there wouldn’t be a real audience waiting for her. Just Leish… and Michael. The moment she stepped on the small, wooden floor, she couldn’t help but think that he had never heard her sing in person. He had never seen her perform live. He had never once been to one of her concerts.

All that stuff – her shows, her records, her performances – had happened in a very complicated moment of her relationship with Michael. She was supposedly with someone else, and he was technically single. Yet that hadn’t prevented them from rolling in the sheets together from time to time. But she – or he – had always left afterward, without any significant promise of eternal love or long-term plans. They had wasted so much time stalling, and her music made the list of the countless things they hadn’t done together for one reason or another.

So, in a way, this was another first for them. The past couple of years sure seemed to be full of those. Their first shock back to reality, their first kids together, their first real, at times painful evolution as a couple… and now, this.

Lisa had thought about the best way to communicate with Michael for days and, the more she had seen him pop up at Hidden Hills, the more emotionally stunted she had felt. She was unable to break the ice and tell him exactly what was happening inside her heart. She didn’t even know why, but she suspected it was because she had allowed this stupid fight to go on way longer than initially planned. Stagnation was dangerous and terrifying. Their past experiences should have taught her that and, in fact, they had. And finally she was about to show Michael just how much.

The stage lights were reddish, dimmed down, yet she could see Michael and Alecia sitting at the small round table just fine. He had turned his chair in her direction and was just staring at her, his face unreadable, his elbow nonchalantly resting on the table. His dinner was forgotten. He looked handsome, and maybe slightly tense. He was probably wondering what the heck was going on.

Lisa’s eyes met his and she felt like drowning for a moment. Almost as if she could not breathe. Then the music started and she took in a big gulp of air, her heart hammering in her chest like a crazy butterfly. Sitting on the stool, she crossed her legs, closed her eyes and began swaying to the music as she held onto the microphone. Her lifeline. The megaphone that connected her heart to his.

This was not going to be a long set, quite the opposite. Just a couple of songs. Yet she hoped it would be meaningful enough to convey the message her soul spelled so clearly despite her spoken words remaining voiceless.

The bluesy sound started to propagate into the room and she had to admit, the acoustic was terrific. Lisa let her voice flow straight from the most intimate part of herself and sang.

“If I ever leave you, baby
You can say I told you so
And if I ever hurt you
You know I hurt myself as well…”

“If that any way for a woman to carry on
Do you think I want my loved one gone?
‘Cause I love you
More than you’ll ever know
More than you’ll ever know…”

Lisa kept her eyes closed and allowed the music – and the lyrics – to channel every single emotion she felt so profoundly. Like an electric shock traveling from her and straight to Michael. Gripping the microphone so tightly that her fingers almost hurt, she sang to him and for him.

“I’m just trying to be somebody
You can love and trust and understand
I know that I could be a part of you
That no one else could see
I just got to hear you say, it’s alright, it’s alright…”

At one point, she almost became all feeling. There was no longer a stool she was sitting on or a spotlight illuminating her from the ceiling. There was no stage, no musicians, no room. No restaurant, no city, no planet Earth. There was just the music and her. And the song went, delivered, and left.

Minutes later, when she finally brought herself to open her eyes again, at first her head spun. But then she focused on Michael’s face, on his beautiful features. He had gotten older so gracefully and beautifully and had never looked more attractive to her. The face of the young man she had fallen in love with so many years earlier and that of the mature guy sitting a few feet away from her overlapped so perfectly, blending, becoming one. Just like how she felt when he was close to her. When they were a solid, open unit. Blended with him.

Michael’s eyes were glazed over and his expression was no longer inscrutable now. She could see everything so easily. She knew that he was surprised – and pleased. She could tell that he was moved almost to tears and that her message had reached its destination.

Lisa smiled and the corners of Michael’s lips rose slightly. He shifted, as if he wanted to clap his hands, and she blinked. He stopped mid-track and just waited, leaning back into his chair, understanding her silent plea.

Wait. Please let me do this. I am not done yet.

She turned back to the drummer and nodded her head. OK. This would be much more complicated than singing an old cover song. This was something she had written – thinking about Michael, of course – and it would be the first time she’d perform it in public. In fact, she hadn’t even recorded it yet. Her husband had never heard it, and she could only hope he would be able to read between the lines. No, scratch that. Lisa knew he would.

“I watch you in the morning, but you would never know
I watch you like a satellite, but I let you go
I will be watching you
I know you’re watching too…”

“A whisper in the hallway, corners of my mind
I hear you out there whispering, but you can’t hear the signs
I hear you whispering
I hope you’re listening…”

Their eyes met again and that intimate contact stayed as she sang the chorus. A few words to show him how her soul felt when he was not there. Nothing short of empty, barren.

“I’m heartless
I’m heartless again…”

That was how she was without him. As if someone had ripped her heart out.

She saw him blink and swallow hard, the movement of his Adam’s apple almost hypnotizing as she gave voice to the second verse. And then the chorus. And the bridge. And the hook again. Telling him what it felt like, for her, to be afraid. What fear could do and how profoundly it could affect her. Honestly hoping that he would understand that she knew she was wrong about their little quarrel, and yet her anguish had much more profound and much more ancient roots. It wasn’t a justification. It was just an explanation.

Toward the end of the song, her voice almost faltered and for a second she thought it would break. But then it didn’t. Instead, it kept sounding loud and clear. Honest. Raw. Because Michael deserved nothing less.

She loved him. She had been in love with him since she had met him. She felt it in every cell of her body, in every neuronal ending, and in that part of her that had no name. This little show she had put up for him, hopefully, would serve its purpose. But it was also – more than everything else – a declaration of love. The powerful intensity of a feeling that had been sweeping her off her feet nonstop since he had woken up from his coma. It had never left her, and she had never shut it down or tried to repress it. Because, again, Michael deserved nothing less.

 

---

 

 

He was stunned. More than he would ever be able to express.

At some point during the night, of course, he had started to wonder if Lisa had something to do with this unexpected dinner with Alecia, but he would have never imagined anything like this. Nothing this intense.

Michael was not sure he had the words to explain how seeing Lisa up on that stage, singing for him and to him alone, had made him feel. It was almost overwhelming, and the fact that he had been caught entirely off guard didn’t help at all. He had been utterly naked. A raw, helpless, defenseless target for her arrows. And he would have never imagined being so elated to get hit straight into his heart.

To be really honest, he had expected – maybe even hoped – that she would sing for him a little longer. After getting a taste, suddenly he wanted more. There was just so much beauty in what he saw and heard. Her long, burgundy dress, wrapping itself around her stunning body so perfectly. Her auburn hair, longer than it had been in forever – because she knew he loved it that way – making her look like a work of art. Her perfect face, those hooded eyes. And her voice. Deep and sultry, seductive enough to slice him open and make him bleed.

Of course, he had heard her songs in the past. On CDs, on the radio. But never live, and certainly never this way. She had never sung for him. And now she had, and the only two songs she had chosen to perform were a love letter. An apology. A clarification of her feelings for him – and her fears. He now understood why Alecia had been involved and, of course, he couldn’t fault either of the two women. The setup and build-up had been perfect, and he was glad he hadn’t seen it coming for once.

When Lisa stood up from her stool, Michael also motioned to rise from his chair, yet his feet remained rooted to the floor for no reason. He was just too stunned. Fascinated. His eyes anchored to her, he watched her rake her hand through her hair and smile at him shyly before leaving the stage. She disappeared behind a dark red curtain and went into the private area only the musicians and the staff were allowed to enter.

The room went quiet again and he just stood there for a moment, allowing what had just happened to sink in. Then he felt Alecia’s hand on his forearm.

He turned his head and looked at her.

“Michael… She’s good, isn’t she? …You alright?”

He just nodded.

She gripped his forearm tighter for a moment in a comforting gesture.

“Look, I am sorry I dragged you here. And I’m sorry for blindsiding you. I just wanted to help her.”

“I understand. It’s OK.”

“And by the way… my offer is still on the table. I truly wasn’t shitting you, Mike. I would love for you to consider working with me.”

Michael smiled.

“Let me know when you got something ready, then.”

“I sure will.”

He pointed at the backstage.

“Hey… If you don’t mind…”

Alecia removed her hand from his forearm and shrugged.

“Hell, no. Of course I don’t.” She glanced at her watch. “In fact, I gotta bolt. Carey is waiting for me at home and I was never supposed to stay here for the entire evening anyway. Lisa, on the other hand… Well…”

“I gotta see her.”

“Yes, I know.” Standing up, she leaned over and kissed his cheek. “I think she wants to see you too. Have fun tonight, guys.”

He just waited until Alecia walked out of the room, waving goodbye one last time, then just sat at the table for a minute to regroup. His heart was going a mile a minute, and the tired complacency he had displayed up until that moment was slowly dissipating. Something else was mounting up. It was anticipation.

Taking a deep breath, Michael emptied his glass of wine and rose from his chair.

 

 

---

 

 

When Michael knocked on the door of her dressing room, Lisa was sitting in front of the mirror in a daze. She felt tired and reinvigorated all at once, emptied and yet full of emotions as it usually happened after she performed, and all she had been waiting for was for him to find her.

In fact, she knew it was him even before replying that he could come in.

The door was right behind her shoulders and she observed him pushing it open in the reflection in the mirror. Michael appeared and just stayed there, looking like royalty in this only mildly informal suit. Black pants, a black shirt, a purple vest and a tie of the same color. It had been quite some time since she had seen him wearing such elegant attire. Lately, their daily life was more informal than anything else and one of the benefits of working behind the scenes was that he could wear sweat pants and hoodies without giving a damn anymore.

But not tonight. It was weird how that apparently insignificant detail struck her, considering that she had seen him wear all kinds of clothes through the years. Yet, what she noticed next was how strangely in tune his outfit was with hers. If this whole thing hadn’t been a surprise, they would have looked like a couple ready for a night out.

Well, if she was lucky, maybe they would end up doing just that…

For the time being, Michael stood at the entrance of her dressing room, his hand still resting on the doorknob. What was he waiting for? Was he about to leave? Lisa blinked, scanning his face in the reflection, still not daring to turn. As if the mirror gave her some kind of protection from her fear of rejection. The old insecurity of never being – doing, saying – enough, especially when it came to him, threatening to slither their way in.

It was hard to come to terms with how profoundly she had changed after what had happened to Michael three years earlier. Never in her life had she been so terrified – or had she felt so close to genuinely losing him for good. It was only natural that such a pivotal event put things in a different perspective, yet getting used to it was easier said than done. She still lived with that anxiety. She felt it crawling under her skin often. The idea that something could happen to him and she wouldn’t be there to help him, to protect him. That feeling too had caused her impasse when it came to this specific fight. How stupid could she be? She should know better than allowing weeks to slip by without fixing things with the man she loved.

“Hey…” The word came out raspy, as if she couldn’t recognize her own voice.

Michael tilted his head, his face calm and composed. Unreadable.

“Hey. I just wanted to let you know that you and Alecia set me up pretty good. Congratulations.”

Her stomach dropped. Was he pissed off?

“Don’t be mad at her, Mike. I was the one asking her to help me out with this.”

“Well, obviously. But I’m not mad at her at all.” He smirked. “You want me to wait outside?”

What? No! She had hoped he’d come. And she hadn’t been entirely convinced he would.

“Not at all. Come on in. Just… please, close the door.”

His eyes narrowed for a moment, as if he was weighing her words. Then he complied – just closing the door quietly, without locking it. She was not sure what she was supposed to make of his behavior.

“You know… I wish I had known about this. I would have brought you flowers… ‘cause you sure deserve them.”

And just like that, Lisa felt like she could breathe much more easily. She recognized his peace offer and closed her eyes for a moment, smiling ever so slightly. When she opened her eyes again, he was standing right behind her back. He had moved silently, like he usually did, and was still looking at her through the safe barrier of the mirror.

His hands came to rest on her shoulders and it was as if an electric shock went through her system. They hadn’t touched each other in weeks, and she could not believe the effect such a simple gesture could still have on her. After so many years, Michael still managed to exert his magnetic pull. She had resigned to the fact that this was something that would never change. She was hooked on him forever.

“I loved your set, Lise. I only wish it would have lasted longer.”

“It was all I needed to say to you.” She shrugged. “Well… that’s not true. I had so much more to say. I still do. But the words just wouldn’t come out. And so I sang. It seemed to be the only way to talk to you…”

She reached up, covering his hand with her own, turning it slightly, kissing his palm. Michael’s eyes softened.

“And I heard you. Loud and clear. That second song… did you write it?”

The corners of Lisa’s mouth lifted in the ghost of a smile.

“Can’t you tell?”

“It was beautiful. It really was. And Lise… I love your voice. The way it sounds. The way it delivered the lyrics. The way the song moved you deep inside… I could tell…”

“Well… I wrote it with you in mind… And you were just sitting there, listening to me for the very first time. Maybe that helped. It was an emotional experience for me, that’s for sure.”

He kept staring at her with a strange look in his eyes, then moved. Without missing a beat, he turned her chair – and her entire body with it – to a side. As if she weighed nothing. The gesture was slow and deliberate, displaying his physical strength without overdoing it. Managing to make her feel hot and bothered pretty much right away. He shifted and crouched down right in front of her so they could finally be face to face.

Then he waited.

She almost had to laugh. He could be such an adorable little bastard! She knew he wanted her to say the words out loud. And she would say those words… in a second. She just needed to do something first.

Reaching out, Lisa pulled his head close and kissed him. Slowly, thoroughly, with absolute abandon. Loving how he immediately responded to her, how his lips parted, his tongue sweeping into her mouth languidly. Her heart rate increased, her body heated up even more. Such was the effect he had on her, even after all this time.

Her fingers still buried in his hair, her senses intoxicated by his mere closeness, she managed to pull back and rested her forehead against his. Her breathing was uneven, but so was his. How comforting – relieving – it was to discover that he, too, was still affected by this undying chemistry.

“I love you…”

First and foremost, he had to know how she felt about him. How her heart would always spell his name, and nobody else’s. Lisa swallowed and her eyes burned when his hands, strong and warm, framed her face. When he kissed her again.

“…And I miss you…” One more kiss, and she pulled back so that she could finally focus on his eyes. “And I am so sorry for hurting you. For what I said to you. It was unfair… You didn’t deserve it. I am sorry, Mike.”

Michael’s forehead distended and she could tell that he was moved. Almost surprised by her clear, adamant confession. More straightforward than he would have probably expected. Yeah, mister. No more tip-toeing around the matter. They had officially become the better version of themselves.

“And I am sorry for making you feel scared and lonely… again. I never meant to.”

She loved that he said that, but it really hadn’t been his fault. What had happened was not his responsibility. Michael was an artist, and his life – no matter how much it had changed in the recent past – would always revolve around art. Lisa had known this since they had gotten together for the first time and their last fight was just the result of a momentary lapse in judgment. An overreaction, despite him not giving her any reason to doubt him or feel insecure about him. She really didn’t want him to think otherwise.

She shook her head, holding onto him, finally experiencing the absolute bliss of blending with him once again. Of becoming one.

“Michael… You didn’t do anything. It was all me, this time.” Swallowing hard again, struggling to leave the warmth and comfort of his body, she pulled back one more time. “You’re you. And you’re the man I love… Just the way you are. I don’t want you to be different. I only want you to come back home.”

“Tonight?”

Absolute elation.

“Yeah… tonight…”

He smiled, and it was like seeing a ray of sunshine cracking the sky open after the longest storm.

“God… I love you, girl. You got no idea how much…” He kissed her again, and while he did so, he pulled her up with him, so they stood face to face. “Even though you drive me crazy… and make me so mad at times I can’t even think straight…”

“I know…” Her hands still holding his head, Lisa pulled him down one more time, needing another kiss. “Let me make it up to you, baby…”

He smiled in the kiss and allowed her to drag him close to the wall.

“It’s gonna take a lot of effort this time… You made me wait way too long, woman…”

How she loved that mischievous, demanding tone in his voice. He sounded serious, but she knew he was anything but. Still, there was so much she wanted to communicate, and knew words would not always be necessary. Thank goodness.

“Yeah… Definitely too long…”

Combustion. A match thrown into a tank of gasoline. Fire ignited, and there was nothing they could do about it. Or would.

Suddenly she found herself against the wall, his body pressed against her, his lips on her neck. His strong hands held her by the waist and, from the faint movements of his hips, she could already tell that he was getting aroused. She knew the feeling. She had experienced it countless times while and after seeing him on stage. Just watching him move, his soul spilling into the music, his body following the rhythm as if he was made of quicksilver, had always been a huge turn-on for her. For a long time she had wondered if she’d ever be able to repay the favor, and now, well…

As he kept kissing her neck, his hand came up and palmed her breast, making her gasp. Lisa threw her head back and closed her eyes, blindly reaching down and caressing him through his elegant pants. Oh, he was turned on alright. But they were way too old to fuck in a dressing room – something they had done several times in the past, the screaming of the crowd getting lost in the distance, swallowed by their sighs and moans.

“Babe…” Just saying the word was extremely difficult for her.

Michael pulled back, his eyes shiny and glazed over, his face flushed.

“Girl… You don’t know. You just don’t know…”

She squeezed his steel slightly and he swallowed, closing his eyes for a moment.

“I do know… Let’s get out of here… let’s go someplace more private… So we can… talk some more…”

He blinked and took a deep breath, forcing himself to regain his composure as much as possible.

“Great idea… what about the ranch?”

Lisa smiled. That was certainly a surprise. She had been thinking about Hidden Hills, and Neverland hadn’t been in her mind at all. Plus, it would be a long ride over to Los Olivos. About two hours.

“Are you sure? It’s pretty far away…”

He stepped back and smoothed down his vest, then took her hand, pulling her close again. Kissing her slowly.

“Yeah. When was the last time you and I went out on a date like that?” His lips found her forehead as she circled his neck with her arms. “And then we can go back home.”

Well… Maybe his way of thinking wasn’t bad at all.

 

 

---

 

 

There was no rush. They had all the time in the world.

It was odd how this had become his mantra since he had woken up from his accident, three years earlier. How the very concept of time had become a staple of his thinking. But after all, everything had changed. Every single aspect of his life had taken a new dimension and Michael had been able to savor it in a way that he had never experienced up until that point. In all frankness, he had always been able to enjoy existence, albeit with some obvious limits. Still, this was an entirely new situation.

Going back to Lisa – getting back with Lisa – all of a sudden had made all the sense in the world. Their previous squabbles, arguments and separations had started to seem stupid and pointless to him. So uselessly painful. He loved her, and she loved him. To be together, and stay together, made all the sense in the world. To have a family. To get married again. To adjust their lives to this new concept of day-to-day routine, and shape their reality the way the most saw fit. What had he been so scared of, before? If those insecurities had worried him in the past, they were nowhere to be found when he had woken up again. And that was why it had hurt him, and in a way even shocked him, to discover that part of Lisa was still stuck there. Anchored to their past, where love and pain would always mix so flawlessly to become almost one identical entity.

For so long he had been in a rush to reach new destinations. And then, suddenly, he had realized that he was tired of running. He had discovered how much he needed to start arriving, resting, and enjoying what he had. With all the time in the world.

Michael had the same principle in mind when he had brought up Neverland as his and Lisa’s safe haven for the evening. A lifetime ago, they had shared so many nights at the ranch, at times with none of their children around. On so many occasions it had been just the two of them. Walking across beautiful lawns, relaxing under the trees, kissing and making up near the ponds and the river. Making love under a blanket of stars. Then the place had also become their kids’ favorite, including their miraculous twins. The girls were still so little, but adored to be immersed in the luscious nature of Los Olivos.

If the place had been poisoned by hatred, lies and greed in the past, it had become sacred again for Michael. His brush with death had once again provided him with a precious new viewpoint, and he was glad he had held onto the ranch. It had allowed him to turn it back into what it used to be and was supposed to be all along. A magical place.

And maybe that was why he wanted Lisa to be there tonight. To once again experience the enchantment they had lived when they had kissed the first time, during one of their walks. It had happened on a summer night and, if only he closed his eyes and allowed himself to be transported into the past once again, he could still feel the wind in his hair, smell the scent of Lisa’s skin, experience the thrilling emotion of her mouth over his.

How exciting it was to be living the same sensory overload now, in this reality. In this time and place.

The last thought that went through Michael’s mind before he lazily opened his eyes was that he was glad the drive to Neverland would take so long.

Once again, he had all the time in the world.

Then he focused on Lisa’s face. It was dimly lit by the yellowish lights of the street lamps passing by. Light, darkness. Light, darkness. Light, darkness. He recognized the look in her eyes – as if she was intoxicated despite not having had a single drop of alcohol. He knew exactly the feeling because it was just the same for him. Two months physically separated from his wife amplified every sensation. Every nerve ending, every cell, every touch.

The window coverings didn’t let anyone see what was happening inside the car. Still, they granted them a perfect sight of what happened outside of it. Black roads swung by like endless snakes as they left the city and drove toward the countryside. Their sanctuary. The glass divider separated the backseats from the driver’s area. Although Michael knew that Vance, his longtime driver, was not the kind of guy who would ever spy on them, he had made sure to have some privacy for what he had in mind. Well… what he and Lisa had in mind…

It was nice to finally be on the same page again.

After pulling the glass divider closed, Michael had also asked Vance to turn on the music and turn up the volume. Right now, whatever song was playing was certainly quite loud in the front seats but very much muffled in the back of the SUV.

Just perfect.

He could hear Lisa’s little sighs and moans in his ear as he held her in his lap, kissing her neck, her cleavage and collarbone, being turned on like crazy by this whole situation, which suddenly made him feel much younger than his age. How long since they had made out like that in the backseats of a car? Ages, probably. Their current routine wasn’t boring in the slightest, but had quieted down quite a bit compared to their wild early years.

However, tonight felt very different. The moment they had gotten into the Suburban and sped off, they had immediately sought physical contact. At first it had been Michael, putting his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. Lisa had rested her head over his chest, and they had watched Los Angeles untangle and swirl outside the car windows until it disappeared in the distance. Not saying a word, just reveling in their newly found closeness.

Then, after a while, she had turned her head and their eyes had met. They had stared at each other for a moment that had seemed to expand forever. Reaching up, she had pulled his head down and they had kissed, gently at first. And then all had morphed once again. Passion had taken over. Within minutes, Lisa was sitting in his lap, her fingers tangled in his hair, her tongue in his mouth. Michael’s head had begun to spin, and his body had responded to her chant. For him, it was simply impossible not to. He was still a sailor, and she was still the mermaid of his very personal ocean.

His hands had found her perfect ass, and he had pulled her even closer. Making her feel every inch of the effect she had on him. She had broken the kiss, and she was already panting. Watching him straight in the eyes, she had unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants, granting him some relief.

“Michael… God, I missed you…”

He had just looked at her intently. Her hair was wild, her lips red and parted. Did she have any idea how stunning she was to him? In her early forties, Lisa was more beautiful and breathtaking than ever. Of course, she was already drop-dead gorgeous when he had first met her as an adult, with that complicated mixture of feral instinct and tenderness that had drawn him to her right away. And then, just like himself, she had evolved through the years, becoming akin to a goddess to him. Created by whatever superior power for him and him alone. The wild hotness of the past had progressively left more space to her seductive, sultry elegance, while her body had become even more voluptuous – and still just as perfect.

No wonder he was still so impossibly attracted to her. No woman in his life had ever been able to be what Lisa was for him.

Of course, he had enjoyed the company of other ladies before she entered his life. And in their “off” phases, for that matter. Flings, affairs, or even sorta-kinda relationships that, at times, had only existed in his head. In some cases, he had put his faith and hopes in those women. His expectations. At one point, before even meeting her, he had been driven by the desperate need to have someone to share his life with, but it had seemed such an impossible task to accomplish. He had felt almost in love so many times, utterly in love a couple on a couple of instances, and always somehow heartbroken afterward. It had been utterly depressing, to the point that he had started to believe he would never find someone who would love him for him. No mask, no public persona, no money or fame, no pretense.

Until Lisa had arrived – and had fallen in love with him for the man he was. Had she also shattered his heart in a thousand pieces in the past, like other girls had done? Yes, but that was only one of the many sides of their story. It all had always been much more complicated than that.

If he had believed he had been in love before, falling in love with her surely had stunned him, leaving him powerless and helpless. The intensity and complexity of his feelings for her were not something he had been fully prepared for. With Lisa, he had thoroughly discovered how glorious and heartbreaking loving someone down until their very essence could be. He had also found out how love and sex could blend so perfectly, turning into one flawless entity that could no longer be discerned or separated. With Lisa, flesh, soul, earthly and otherworldly had become one and the same in the bat of an eyelid.

Of course, with such feelings also came intense heartbreak. Their fights, their separations, had hurt him more than he had ever been willing to admit to her or himself. He had downplayed his pain way too many times, to the point that she had started to doubt his love altogether. After all, he seemed to feel nothing, and even after their divorce he had looked as cool as a cucumber. At least in public.

But it was all make-believe. Her absence weighed him down, making it almost impossible to breathe. Making him think he never wanted to experience any of those feelings again. If this was what love was all about, it was simply not worth the misery.

It was no use, of course. Every single time they had reunited she had been capable of healing him. And he, her. If anything, the past couple of years had given him a pretty clear observation point into his wife’s suffering, which he had often brushed off as if it was some kind of over-dramatization. Or he had simply been too caught up in his own hang-ups to make space for hers too.

Since he had woken up from his coma, he had felt that he and Lisa were even. They always had been. And that realization had filled him with immense relief, allowing him to finally open up to her again. To be trustful and vulnerable. To let her all the way into his heart for good. Not just into his bed, like it had happened countless times in the past, when he had kept her at arm’s length emotionally, not wanting to get hurt anymore. When really, all that had happened was also his doing. He was hurting himself without even realizing it.

But not now. Whatever resentment they had felt for one another at some point during their bumpy relationship was finally gone, swept away by the cold shower of losing their loved one forever. No wonder every single puzzle piece had fallen into place. Their marriage, their babies, their family.

That was why, all in all, Michael had never been too worried about this last fight, it didn’t matter how gruff it had been. He hadn’t fallen into any dark depression, he hadn’t started getting anxious, thinking that once again they would crash and burn. In fact, he had always been sure that everything would be alright eventually. He only needed her to speed up the process.

It was now almost impossible to disentangle the emotional and physical aspects of his love for her. Once he and Lisa were all in, they were indeed all in, no holds barred.

He let his hands slide from her ass up to her waist and ribcage, then cupped her breasts, caressing her through the lacy material of her dress. Lisa stopped kissing his neck, pulled back and stared at him, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip. Her hands still on his steel, caressing him through his underwear. How he wished she would just free him altogether and do something to ease his tension.

“Either you fuck me here and now or ask your driver to get somewhere with a bed quickly…”

Michael smiled. She was a nut!

“I thought you had become more patient.”

His voice was casual, but he too was in dire need of some release. Yet, he wanted this moment to prolong itself into eternity. He wanted this night to last forever and mark another beautiful milestone in their relationship, before they went back home to their children. Speaking of which…

“Well, I haven’t. Fuck patience.”

“Hey… How long ‘til we gotta go back to Hidden Hills, Lise? The kids…”

“Riley and Ben went camping with their friends for the weekend. And the babysitters will be at our house until tomorrow at noon, regardless of what we do or where we are…”

He almost had to laugh.

“You had everything planned, huh?”

She took a deep breath and sat back, tossing her long hair. Some auburn strands randomly fell back around her face, making her look even more gorgeous. One hand was on his shoulder, as if this was some casual conversation, but her hips kept pushing down on his crotch. Yeah. He knew exactly where her mind was at the moment.

“No, actually I didn’t. I just thought there were only two possible scenarios after putting on my little show for you. Either you’d come home with me and we’d spend some quality time together, talking things through and maybe making love, or I’d have to get drunk all alone to get over being rebuffed by my husband once again…”

Michael’s smile faltered a little.

“I never rebuffed you, Lise…”

She winced.

“No, you didn’t. You’re right. But perception can be a bitch.” Her hand touched the side of his face. “Look… I knew you were waiting for me to make the first move, and you were one hundred percent right. But every time you left after I didn’t do what I should have done, I felt as if I had wasted another opportunity. And it felt like you were rejecting me… even though you were doing nothing.”

She tilted her head, stroking his cheek and neck.

“It’s silly, I know, but I was stuck. With every day that went by, it seemed to me I could reach out to you less and less. And I didn’t know how to stop you from leaving. It was almost fucking paralyzing. What’s even worse is that I knew that talking to you and telling you I was sorry would have probably been enough…”

“Yeah… It would have been…”

Her head dropped.

“…God. I feel so stupid.”

Michael tipped her chin up so that their eyes would meet again.

“Hey. Don’t ever say that. You’re not stupid, OK? I know what it’s like to feel stuck… to not really know how to express how you feel… Remember how much you nagged me about that in the past? So either you’re not stupid, or we both are.”

“Yeah, that must be it. Maybe we both are super-dumb.”

She rolled her eyes and scoffed, trying to downplay her emotions, but he could tell that his words were acting like a balm to her. Feeling elated and proud of himself, of how much they had evolved as a couple, he sat up and pulled her closer – kissing her lightly, again and again. The flames in the pit of his stomach once again were stoked high.

“Lisa, Lisa… You gotta know I wasn’t punishing you. I was just hurt. Plus, I was… following the rules…”

Right. The rules.

They had also been clear about those when they had gotten back together. Countless previous experiences told them that little quarrels and arguments would never fully vanish. They now got along perfectly and communicated beautifully most of the time, but knew they were both wired in their own peculiar way. Their love had always been intense, if not explosive. They had both accepted and even embraced that volatile aspect of their personalities.

Their growth had been about realizing that, more often than not, they would always know when an apology was due. And when accepting an apology was the right way to go. And so they had agreed that they would try to be more humble, open enough to say sorry to one another whenever necessary. Or at least talk things through if they felt insecure about what exactly had happened and who, among the two of them, had messed up and stepped into a big pile of shit.

In this case, there was no doubt that Lisa had to take that crucial first step. She was just sorry she had waited so long, because time with Michael had never been more precious to her. Every single instant was entwined with the most profound meaning.

“Right. In my rational thinking, I am aware of all that. What I don’t know is what happened to me, ‘cause those darn rules apply to me too! I guess there’s still some crap I gotta fix within myself, especially when it comes to you.” She paused, her eyes lowered. “I’ll work on that, I promise.”

“We’ll work on it together… Like we always do.” He pushed a strand of long hair behind her ear. “As surprising as it might sound, I’m not perfect either…”

Lisa laughed one of those dry laughs he had always adored. Low, raspy, sexy.

“Yeah? You could have fooled me…” She allowed him to pull her close once again and spoke right against his lips. “…’cause sure as fuck you seem to be pretty much perfect for me… oddness and all…”

“I’m not odd…” He kissed her slowly, deeply. “I just gotta constantly adjust myself if I wanna navigate life with that crazy woman of mine…”

“And do you want that? Navigate life with her?”

“Really a lot…”

“Fair enough…” Just a whisper before she kissed him again.

And this time, Michael no longer wanted to talk. Not because he was retreating and folding into himself, but simply because nothing else needed to be said. All was out in the open, like it was supposed to be. Finally.

Within seconds, passion had taken over and he knew there was no longer way to stop it. Part of him really wanted to take Lisa there and then, bury himself inside her warm, tight body and finally find solace. Yet, anticipation always managed to make everything even more exciting.

They kept kissing and, when she touched him again, he guided her hand inside his boxers, loving how she moaned in his mouth – and how she never broke the kiss.

“You feel that, Lise? Can you feel what you do to me? Shit…”

“Michael…”

“Touch me, baby…”

He felt her fingers close around him and his eyes squeezed shut. All the while, he caressed her naked thighs underneath the dress she was wearing, bouncing the fabric up until that magnificent, perfect ass was finally at least partly visible. Opening his eyes for a moment, he glanced down and almost lost it at the image of his hand on that beautiful, round globe – barely covered by a red g-string.

He needed more. Or, at least, enough to take the edge off until they arrived at the ranch.

He hooked her flimsy underwear with his fingers.

“Can I take this off?”

Lisa’s hand closed tighter around his steel and she began to stroke him. Once again that glazed over look in her eyes did absolutely nothing to tame his arousal.

“Yes, please, daddy…”

Something snapped. His self-control and, a second later, her g-string too. He ripped it off as if it was nothing and Lisa’s reaction was a soft purr. And her tongue down his throat again. The motions of her hand on him intensified and Michael’s breathing became slightly ragged. Needing to do something, anything, he stroked her ass and reached around more, finding her warm center from behind. Caressing her liquid heat, loving how she immediately arched against him, pretty much pushing her perky breasts in his face. He pulled her dress down with his free hand and breathed in the unmistakable scent of her skin. Familiar, seductive and intoxicating.

On her part, Lisa certainly tried to help him out, as she held his head close to her chest. His mouth found her nipple and he closed his eyes, reveling in the moment – absolutely loving how unbridled this thing was getting. He would have never, ever imagined that the evening would end this way. Straining into her hand, he allowed his hips to push up and set the rhythm of her caress to match the motion of his fingers inside her body. He couldn’t wait to feel her tight heat again… in a very different manner.

However, this heavy petting wasn’t half bad either. Sex with Lisa had never been boring, but it certainly had been quite some time since they had gotten this hot and heavy in a car. To make out like that seemed such a silly thing to do, for a married couple reaching their middle age, and yet there was something so intensely erotic in their actions. It was the luxury of knowing your lover’s body like your own. A geographical pleasure map that they had already explored countless times and yet never ceased to amaze them with new, unforgettable corners.

He let go of her breast and raised his head, finding her lips again. When they broke the kiss, their foreheads kept touching and their motions on one another didn’t stop. He could barely make out Lisa’s face, but it seemed to him he could see her eyes. Sparkling and of a weird shade of blue, like some Caribbean seas.

“Mike… don’t you dare stop… Oh, shit…”

“I ain’t gonna stop… But damn… if you keep that grip up I’m not sure I’m gon’ last much longer…”

She smiled, breathlessly.

“Me neither…”

Well, then… He would make sure she reached her peak while he was still mildly capable of controlling himself.

And so he did.

Michael knew where and how to touch her. He knew how to look at her as he did so. Knew the words she wanted to hear, and whispered them in her ear as her lower body began to ride his hand more aggressively. All he could think about was how hot what they were doing was, and how he never got bored with this incredible chemistry they shared. Trying to regulate his breathing, he watched her as she slowly slipped down the hill and toward the powerful pleasure he knew he could always deliver. Her body trembled and she bit down on his shoulder, maybe a little harder than he would have liked. It didn’t even matter. He watched her come and, as he did so, he felt liberated from all the sadness and emptiness that had plagued the previous weeks.

“Oh, fucking hell…” Another bite, and she pulled the collar of his shirt to a side so her lips could find his skin. She kissed and nipped at his shoulder as her pelvis kept undulating over him, as her hand stroked him more aggressively. “I wanna feel you… Give it to me, baby…”

That was it. Either he was going to stroke out at any moment or he just allowed himself to let go. Before he could really make up his mind, the tornado approached and he knew there was nothing he could do to stop it. He hadn’t intended to reach the finish line like this, but it was simply impossible with Lisa. She knew how to pull every single drop of pleasure out of him if only she wanted to.

And she did.

Trying very hard not to moan out loud, Michael glanced down – at her small hand on him. He observed her scoot back ever so slightly so that she could focus entirely on him. His fingers left her body and all that was left was the precipice. What finally did him in was the look into her eyes as she watched the pleasure she inflicted.

Then it was nothing but a blazing light behind his closed eyelids. It was his gritted teeth as, for a moment, he forgot where he was. And then it was Lisa’s mouth closing on him, causing him to almost jump out of his skin. Struggling he opened his eyes and noticed that she was kneeling between his legs. One hand still holding him at the base of his penis, the other grasping his thigh. The backseats of the SUV were spacious enough for her lithe frame, but the universe as a whole felt almost too small to contain the love he felt for her.

“Lise… Holy shit…”

Her mysterious eyes looked up at him for a moment and then half-closed seductively. All he could do was throw his head back and allow her to do to him whatever she wanted. That was the beauty of what they shared.

 

 

---

 

 

Lisa had expected to find the ranch pretty much deserted. And, in a way, it was. She knew Michael had been there a couple of days earlier for some business meeting, so it made sense that at least some of the staff was still actively working on the premises. However, it had taken him one single phone call to have the whole amusement park going just for the two of them.

And it was magical like it had always been.

After spending some quality time together in the car, they had somehow managed to make themselves presentable again and just enjoyed the last part of the drive in each other’s arms. She had felt relaxed and fulfilled, not only thanks to the powerful orgasm they had shared, but mostly because she knew that her world had found its balance again. With him, always with him.

She still wanted to drag him to bed and make up for all the lost time, but now also understood why he had chosen Neverland for their little date. To remind her what they had, where they came from and where they could still go together.

It was so beautiful to think that this place could still be the recipient of such wonderful memories. Of so many hopes. Michael’s personal creation had become a shelter for her too.

They held hands as they walked through the multicolored lights of the funfair. The music, the scent of popcorn permeated the air. Lisa glanced around and smiled, then pulled Michael by the sleeve.

He leaned in, offering her his ear.

“All for us?”

“All for you, baby girl.”

She laughed.

“I don’t think your staff is happy, you know. It’s almost midnight.”

“Oh, don’t worry. It’s their night shift, anyway. Plus, there’s free food and rides for everyone.”

God, how she loved him.

“So… where do you wanna take me?”

He squinted his eyes and smirked, looking so young again, and pointed at the Ferris Wheel.

“What about that?”

She stopped mid-step. Yeah. It did make sense.

One of the things she had always loved about Michael was his subtly dominant side. She had spotted it right away when they had become friends, and it had emerged even more when they had started dating. It was an alpha streak that she had never seen in any other man. Whereas many guys would usually brag and be loud, Michael managed to command authority and respect by simply speaking or being there. And it wasn’t about his fame, either. It was something so intrinsically intertwined with who he was as a person that it was just impossible to ignore.

Lisa had never wanted to be in the spotlight or at the center of attention, preferring to stay just a step behind. Being born with that last name and those features, she had been in no condition to choose for such a long time. Until she had found Michael. She loved to take care of him, to be his solid vessel, someone he could count on. She loved how, in their relationship, she could be his comfort while, at the same time, feeling utterly womanly and having him take care of her as well. She adored not being in the position to decide everything every single time. With Michael, she had not only found a soul mate but also the kind of man who embodied the most virtuous paradigm of masculinity.

They had discovered right away how flawless that delicate balance between his domineering attitude and her strength of character was. How, when it was just about the two of them and no external forces tried to intrude their universe, they could be so perfectly complementary. A solid unit that nothing and nobody could shatter – two individuals who trusted one another and, more often than not, could read each other’s minds like an open book.

How could he know that, right now, she needed this when she had just realized it? She was supposed to be the one delivering the surprises tonight! Well, OK. She would let him take the lead – which she loved, anyway – and then catch him off guard again. After all, going down on him in the car had just been the appetizer.

Lisa just smiled politely at the guy in charge of the Ferris Wheel and didn’t say a word as he and Michael exchanged some pleasantries. It wasn’t the first time they were the only ones enjoying the rides, but certainly it was the first time they did it after getting married again. It felt thrilling, like a new experience.

She and Michael sat in the cabin and the Ferris Wheel started moving. Instinctively, she scooted closer to him and he immediately put his arm around her, holding her against his body. Making her feel safe and protected – like she always did when they found their harmony, their shared melody.

They ascended into the night – into the blackness of the sky, studded with countless tiny white specks. The almost full moon graced his features with the most delicate light and she just stared at her husband, mesmerized.

The wheel stopped when they reached the top and Lisa took a deep breath, taking in the scent of this summer night. The air was clean, crispy. Everything was perfect.

See? It took very little to return to where you wanted to be…

It was the truth. Despite the human tendency to always complicate things, she could see how, sometimes, all you needed and wanted was just at arm’s length.

Feeling slightly cold, she snuggled closer to him and he did something she hadn’t been expecting. He used the jacket he was wearing like a blanket for her. Without taking it off, just opening it further and making space for her body. Her heart filled with even more love, like it usually happened when Michael did something very small and apparently trivial, but able to shake the entire foundations of who she was.

“It’s so peaceful up here… So quiet. That’s why I wanted to be here with you. It kinda gives you a different perspective on stuff, don’t you think?” He kissed her head and his lips lingered there for a moment. “I wish we could stay like this forever. Or that we could replay this moment for eternity, at least… Whenever we need some solace. Some reprieve of sorts.”

Lisa held onto his shirt, inhaling the familiar scent of his aftershave. He always smelled so good. And that sensory feeling was home to her. Her home was in his arms.

“Michael…”

“Yes?”

He glanced down at her and their eyes met. He looked relaxed, serene. Maybe even happy.

“I love you. So much… I am so in love with you, baby.”

His body relaxed further and he smiled at her. A shy, yet unguarded smile that made him look as if years hadn’t passed at all.

“I love you too, Lise. I hope you know how much.”

Her eyelids fluttered closed. Yes, she did.

Now she did.

 

 

---

 

 

When he and Lisa finally entered his private quarters an hour later, Michael had something very different in mind. He had planned to take her, mark her his, worship her body until she was breathless and spent – and unable to doubt his love or his willingness to be close to her.

Besides, he craved her. He longed for her body. Not only did he want to reciprocate what she had done to him on their way over to the ranch, but to also remind her how much she meant to him in every sense that mattered. How profoundly he loved her.

However, Lisa had a different idea of what should transpire – and quite uncharacteristically, Michael didn’t mind letting her take the lead. At least for a little while. After all, he had been the one telling her that she needed to make it up to him…

And so, when she took his hand and dragged him upstairs to his bedroom, he simply followed her. Loving the sight of her perfect derrière swaying right in front of his face as she climbed up the stairs. Slapping it slightly, playfully, too – making her squeal and laugh. He loved when they could be silly, and the past couple of months had been so serious and somber…

Then again, seriousness could be fun, too. Once they arrived at the foot of the bed, Lisa pushed him on the mattress unceremoniously and stood there, nudging his legs open with her own, looking down at him.

“Hey, careful! I’m an old guy, after all…”

She gave him one of her Lisa smirks and raised an eyebrow.

“Bullshit. You’re only old when it benefits you…” Moving closer, she brushed his crotch with her knee. “Stay right there, don’t move.”

“Yes ma’am…”

Michael let his head fall back and observed her intently as she stepped back, walking over to the mini-bar and opening it. She chose a bottle of scotch. From an excellent year, too! Pouring the amber liquid in two glasses, she sipped some straight from the bottle and his eyebrows arched.

Lisa put the bottle down.

“What? Do you mind?”

He laughed at her casual, yet assertive tone.

“Hell, no. Knock yourself out.”

Once again she walked over, handing him the glass. As they drank, they kept staring at each other. Michael remained passive when Lisa took the glass from his hand and put it on the carpeted floor with her own. When she rose again, she started unzipping her dress.

“Did you notice that I’m not wearing any bra?”

He cocked his head to a side. Of course he had noticed. It had been one of the best surprises during their make-out session in the car.

“I might have had an inkling earlier, yeah…”

“And considering that my panties are in the backseats of your SUV, what do you think of me walking around all bare underneath this dress?”

His dick immediately reacted. He couldn’t even control it – it happened before he could even realize it. He hadn’t really thought about that until this very moment, but now all of a sudden his arouse-o-meter climbed higher for sure.

“You know I love it when you parade around in the nude… But what I love the most is getting you naked…”

His tone had dropped an octave. It hadn’t been purposeful, yet it had its effect on Lisa. Her eyes sparkled.

“Well, I’m getting myself naked tonight…”

Why did she look like she wanted to add something?

“Come on, baby girl. ‘Fess up. Say what you wanna say.”

“Do what you wanna do, you mean…”

She let her dress slide down, finally revealing her body. It was breathtaking. She truly was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on – and she was his wife. She removed her shoes and kicked them away and almost stumbled in the process. It made him smile. And got him harder. She had no idea how sexy she always appeared to him.

“I promise not to fall on my face and spoil this moment!” Lisa giggled and he sat up, pulling her close by the hand. Forcing her to sit in his lap once again.

“Come here…” He framed her face and turned serious again. Feeling as if he could no longer wait. “Kiss me…”

She complied, then pulled back.

“Hey! You’re not supposed to be in charge, remember?”

“I know. Kiss me again…”

Smiling, she found his mouth one more time and this time their kiss lasted much, much longer. Without breaking contact, Lisa started unbuttoning his vest. She wouldn’t have to take care of his tie, as they had forgotten it in the car, together with her underwear. Michael helped her out, removing the suddenly useless piece of clothing. At the same time, her fingers were already busy undoing the buttons of his shirt.

She pushed him back so that he could lie down once again and her mouth started to follow the path traced by her hands. First his jawline, then his neck, the delicate skin of his throat. His shoulders, then his chest. Her lips closed on his nipples, making him shiver and moan, then moved lower – toward his abdomen. His muscles contracted under that intimate touch but still he didn’t stop her.

The tip of her tongue caressed his abs, then his pelvis. Her fingernails scraped his ribcage. Feeling the pressure mounting, Michael reached down and started to undo his pants. Lisa took his hands, interlaced her fingers with his and kissed his knuckles.

“No… Let me…”

He removed his hands, taking a series of deep breaths, looking down at her. He let her unzip his pants and pull them down, remove them, together with his boxers. Let her hold his steel again. Watched her intensely as she left a trail of kisses on his thighs and hipbone. Then, when her mouth approached the most sensitive part of his body, he pushed her hair back just to have a better view of her gorgeous face as she loved him that way.

It became hard to keep his eyes open. That intimate contact had been kind of unexpected in the car, and he was surprised how positively shocking it could still be. She primed him just enough to get him entirely hard – not that it was ever a difficult task for her – then her mouth left him. Making him feel cold and forlorn for a second.

He recovered quickly when her sinuous body slid up against his and they kissed again.

She framed his face, then her fingers tangled in his hair. Meanwhile, her center found him and he knew he wouldn’t need any help breaching her sweet body. She started to take him in slowly, and he could tell she was delaying the process on purpose, enjoying every inch of his love for her. Or maybe she did it just to have him go crazy with desire.

Finally, she rose and sat on him fully, letting out a long, sexy moan, her head thrown back.

“God… I don’t think I’ll ever get used to you…”

Michael smiled, caressing her forearms, once again entwining his fingers with hers.

“And I don’t think I’ll ever get used to you… see how lucky we are?”

Her hair wild and long, tousled and down her back, her perfect lips and those eyes hypnotized him for a moment. Then their eyes met. Lisa bit her lip and her pelvis swayed on him ever so slightly.

“We really are. But let me tell you something… For the past two months, you’ve been nothing but this polite, demure gentleman… Not a word out of place. Always flawless. Always perfect.” She caressed his chest languidly, traced his solid muscles. “…While all I want is for you to talk dirty to me and fuck me into oblivion…”

Yeah? Was that what his woman wanted? Hot, steamy, unbridled lovemaking? Did she still get a kick from hearing him say stuff he would never repeat outside the bedroom? Then he would give her just that. He couldn’t ask for a better outcome.

Michael sat up and cupped her ass while he nuzzled her neck.

“Then get ready for the pounding of a lifetime, Princess…”

 

 

---

 

 

At one point during the night, she began thinking that he would kill her. But in the best possible way. Death by sheer sexual and emotional pleasure… what better way to go? If she had planned to make it up to him, he certainly had done his best to do the same for her. Which made everything even more fulfilling.

One thing that had never vanished during her relationship with Michael was how they both saw sex as an art form. Through the years, he had credited her for having been the one able to unleash the most uninhibited part of him, chisel his most intimate nature, give him the chance to experience physical intimacy in the freest and most liberating way. The truth was that it had been the same for Lisa. Maybe she had more experience in terms of relationships than Michael, when they had first started dating. Still, only with him had she been able to enjoy and live the very act of lovemaking as a transcendent experience that crossed the boundaries of body and soul. He had been the only man capable of taking her to such heights that she never wanted to come down again. Only with him had she experienced a level of pleasure so intense to border on pain.

Since their second wedding, things had possibly slowed down a bit. Not in quantity or quality, but in how they made love. After their divorce, they had gone through a long phase as “just lovers” which had been entirely reckless on so many levels. They were madly in love and, at the same time, full of bitterness, unresolved issues and unsaid words. It all resulted in an explosive combo whenever they saw each other: their encounters were often scorching, rushed and beyond intense. She had tried to downplay their depth several times, whenever she felt the need to protect herself from the grip he still had on her. She had called them fuckfests, reducing them to much, much less than what they really were.

What a stupid, pointless defense mechanism. Her heart had always spelled Michael’s name in a Morse code that was impossible not to read correctly.

This new phase of their lives was different. Everything was out in the open and there was nothing they kept concealed from each other. Issues were discussed. When fights would happen, they were resolved – sometimes quickly and effectively, sometimes limping toward the solution, like in this case. Such peacefulness had also found its way in their sex life, turning their blazing marathons into languid, soul-crushing experiences.

Tonight had a new flavor, however, and it was the perfect concoction of what they used to have and what they had now.

Michael had loved her furiously, passionately, taking her breath away multiple times. She had responded to the onslaught with equal fervor, reciprocating his passion and never granting him a way out. They were together in this – in all the ways that counted. She knew that, when they got in the mood like that, there was nothing that could stop such a perfect communion. Her whole body responded to his chant, like a river flowing wildly toward the sea, perceiving all of him. His skin, his breathing, and his steel invading her.

At one point, he was behind her – and inside of her. He had risen onto his knees and had brought her with him. She had felt her back adhering to his warm, sweaty chest. She had felt his breathing, the oxygen filling his lungs, his ribcage expanding against her skin. His arms were around her – one across her chest, the other sliding lower, from her abdomen to her center. His fingers had touched her, caressed her in that perfect way that only he knew. His lips were on her shoulder, kissing her sweetly. The contrast between the tenderness of his caresses and the feeling of being filled completely by him, of having her body almost struggle to accommodate all of him, stunned her.

His hair damp and tickling her, he had breathed in and out several times – and she could tell he was trying very hard to delay that final jump into the sun a little longer. Finally, his mouth had brushed her ear.

“Look at us… Can you see that? How perfect we are together?”

Merely a husky whisper, yet Lisa heard him loud and clear. Struggling to breathe, she focused on the multi-sensory experience she was living for just a moment. All her senses were finely tuned on Michael and him alone. At that very moment, he was all that existed.

Then she finally brought herself to look up and met his eyes in the mirror facing the bed. She blinked. God, he was right. They were beautiful. Perfect together. Their bodies fitting into one another like two pieces of the same puzzle. Naked and sweaty, they looked like an art piece, a marble statue depicting the very concept of connection. Of predestination. Eternal, immortal.

Swallowing hard, she closed her eyes for a moment. They burned. Still hard inside her, he seemed to relax the rest of his body and held her more gently.

“Girl… you OK?”

Her eyes still closed, she smiled and blindly reached up, holding onto his arm. Turning her head, she found his lips and they shared the umpteenth kiss of the night. They couldn’t get enough. She finally stared at him again through the mirror.

“Yeah… It’s just… I guess you took my breath away for a second…”

He smiled, and her heart became ten times bigger. And yet, still unable to contain all the love she felt for him.

“Gosh, Lise… I love you so much…” She saw him bite his lip. She saw the little crease appear between his eyebrows like it usually happened when he was focused on something. His face turned serious and his arm around her chest loosened its grip. “Get down, baby… on your hands…”

That was it. Lisa complied, allowing him to do with her body whatever he wanted. Granting him complete access, recognizing all his signals – verbal and otherwise. She felt him twitch and throb inside of her and realized she was about to come. And that he was too. She was ready for him to take her to that place where no pain, no worry and no imperfection existed.

“Fuck me, baby. You got no idea what it does to me to feel you like this…” Their eyes were still locked and she saw him blush. Not out of embarrassment, but because he was turned on. “…To have you lose control. Give it to me. I wanna feel you come…”

“Shit…” Gritting his teeth, he resumed moving – and it wasn’t gentle. It was exactly what they both needed.

When they broke that invisible barrier between this world and any other world, when all universes aligned and welcomed them, when he finally released inside her and she, too, screamed out as her body clenched around him in pleasure, all her insecurities and all her old fears tumbled into a bottomless abyss. Disappearing, going, gone.

Afterward, Michael once again kept holding her as lay down and he turned onto his side, bringing her with him. Instinctively, Lisa reached behind and grabbed his ass.

“Don’t leave just yet…”

She felt him smile against her burning hot skin.

“No worries. I’m not going anywhere…”

“Well, at some point you’ll have to pull out. But not now. I love it when you stay inside of me afterward…”

He kissed her neck, and pushed her hair to a side to have more access to her shoulder, her cheek.

“How about I stay here forever?”

She giggled.

“If you do, we’re never gonna leave this bed…”

“And that would be a problem, because…?”

God, she loved him when he was silly and carefree like this. Just in case, she gently bit his forearm.

“Ouch!”

Suddenly recalling something very important, finally feeling her soul come back into her body, Lisa lifted her head and glanced at the clock on the wall. She smiled and scooted forward, moaning lightly when he left her body.

“Hey! You just said…”

“I know what I said. Wait…” Her body felt weird, no longer solid. Even after all these years, Michael still had the power to turn her into stardust. “I just remembered I gotta give you something…”

“Can it wait?”

“Nope.”

“But you just gave me something alright…”

She turned and smiled at him. Lying there, his short and curly hair a mess, his body still sweaty and relaxed, he was beyond handsome.

“And if you’re good and still up to it, you’re gonna get some more before this night ends…”

Wincing, she managed to stand up and grabbed Michael’s shirt from the floor, putting it on but keeping it unbuttoned over her naked chest. She was getting a bit chilly and this would do. Until Michael heated her up again.

Pretending not to pay attention to him – he had propped up on his elbow and was following her every move – she walked over to her purse, which she had abandoned near the stairs. There it was, what she was looking for.

“What’s that? What you got?”

He was so damn nosy! Lisa chuckled and shook his head and she sauntered to the bed, holding her little prize behind her back.

“Give me your hand and close your eyes.”

Michael’s eyebrows rose as he eyed her suspiciously, curiously. She laughed again as she sat down next to him.

“Oh my God! Come on!”

“Fine…” Sighing, he complied.

Her heart hammering in her chest, she placed the golden and red treasure she was so proud to have found for him in the palm of his hand. Then she leaned over and kissed his lips sweetly.

“Happy birthday, baby…” Tenderly, she pushed a curl away from his forehead. “You can open your eyes, now…”

There was very little Lisa loved more than surprise and please Michael. And the look of sheer wonder in his eyes when he saw what she had been planning to give him for weeks was the biggest reward for her.

“Oh my God… What is this?”

She lightly touched the gem with the tip of her finger.

“It’s a rarity. Something unique. Just like you.”

The jewel sparkled in the dim light. Surrounded by its thin golden frame and enriched by a precious platinum chain, it looked even more sophisticated. Glancing up, she noticed that Michael was still waiting for her to explain what he was looking at. She shrugged, feeling a bit shy suddenly.

“It’s red beryl. See how irregular and uneven its shape is? It’s because it’s raw. It doesn’t need to be polished or turned into something it’s not. It’s one of the rarest and most desirable gemstones in the world… just the way it is. In fact, the rawer, the better.” She noticed that his eyes were welling up and decided to keep her gaze on the gem instead. The last thing she wanted right now was to become a sniveling mess just because her husband seemed touched by her birthday present. “I’m so proud I could find one of such a deep, saturated red color… because it reminds me of you. It’s unique and exceptionally resilient… And beautiful… just like you, Mike.”

“I thought it was an emerald at first.” His voice broke even though he tried very hard to sound unaffacted.

“It’s a misnomer, actually. Emeralds are green by definition… See? I have studied! But anyway…” She finally found his eyes. “Want me to help you put it on?”

“Yeah… put it on for me…”

Damn. He was moved for real, she could tell. At this very moment, he didn’t need to know she had chosen that gemstone because it signified shedding all unwanted emotional baggage while realizing your full potential. She wanted this night to be a serene, quiet memory. Another page of their lives filled with feelings of harmony and disarming balance to be cherished forever.

As she moved behind his back and carefully chained the necklace around his perfect neck, Lisa truly hoped they could spend more time like this. Immersed into the darkness, yet illuminated by the stars. Waiting for sunrise. For that special moment when the sky was neither dark nor blue. When everything was colored in a violaceous light, immutable and perfect.

 

End.

 

 

Happy birthday Michael.

1958 – Forever.