Push Play – Take 9 | Ellipsis

Take 9 | Ellipsis

 

Ellipsis

The omission from speech or writing of a word or words that are superfluous or able to be understood from contextual clues.
As a cinematic definition, ellipsis is both a narrative device and the most basic idea in film editing. It concerns the omission of a section of the story that is either obvious enough for the public to fill in or concealed for a narrative purpose, such as suspense or mystery.

It is also the shortening of the plot duration of a film achieved by deliberately omitting intervals or sections of the narrative story or action. An ellipsis is marked by an editing transition (a fade, dissolve, wipe, jump cut, or change of scene) to omit a period or gap of time from the film’s narrative; an ellipse in a script (designated in the text as “….”), either allows for a pause, and/or omits a portion of the sequence of events allowing the reader to fill in the narrative gaps.

Sitting in the backseats of his SUV, Michael stared at the road outside the window. His mind was a blank slate. He was hot, bothered, frustrated and… sad, too. The happy lightheadedness he had felt while spending about an hour or so with Lisa and her kids was turning into dust. What was taking its place was now an intense sense of loneliness. He felt as if something was missing in his life but didn’t want to investigate his inner feelings too much. They were dangerous when they became too strong, and he knew he couldn’t reign over them.

Visiting Lisa at Hidden Hills had been interesting. To put it mildly. He knew he had kind of ambushed her – and he was very much aware he should have called her first. But his actions had been purposeful: Michael didn’t want Lisa to have the time to get ready to face him and put up a front. He wanted an honest reaction. And he had gotten it. Man…

The moment she had opened the door, he had felt how vulnerable she was to him. He had seen her eyes, registered her surprise – and profound understanding – when he had given her the bouquet. She knew why he had chosen those flowers. He had done it in the past and she still remembered. The unsaid had been left unsaid, but it didn’t matter. The message had been received somehow, loud and clear.

And when their hands had touched… Oh, shit. Everything in his body had reacted in zero time. Including some body parts he didn’t have control over. So, yeah. By trying to play Lisa he had played himself as well, because he was not prepared to face his own reactions either.

Everything about their night at the Hideout had come back to him just by sharing the same space with her. It had flooded his senses. Her touch, the scent of her skin, her taste, her moans in his ear, her warm tightness closing around him. When Roman had appeared in his field of view, the only thing Michael had felt was intense irritation. Not guilt, not shame, not remorse. And the moment he had laid eyes on the guy something had clicked. There was just something about him that Michael didn’t like, and it annoyed him to realize that he couldn’t understand what it was. Nothing but a gut feeling, but strong enough not to be ignored.

Dude kissing Lisa sure had been a nice kick in the balls, too, but Michael was pretty sure he had managed to take the uppercut without even stumbling back. She, on the other hand… oh, she had blushed… and not in a good way.

Then she had gotten mad – of course. She had all the right to, Michael knew it. He knew all about contrasting feelings.

Roman’s arm around Lisa’s shoulder had acted like an electric shock, and the only thing Michael had wanted to do was to pull the lady away from him, like some Neanderthal. At the same time, an evil voice inside of him reminded him that only the night before he had been buried inside another woman’s body, so it was a case of pot calling the kettle back, really. Neither one of them was in the position of being jealous, and yet he knew they both were. That was how they functioned. Or malfunctioned. They seemed unable to stay when they were together, and they almost couldn’t function when they were apart. The paradoxes of life.

So, OK. By all means, Roman was a dick. Michael knew that his sorta-kinda father figure was what had pulled Lisa to him. He wondered if the grey-haired guy had somehow accomplished what he had failed at. Maybe Roman made Lisa feel safe and secure in the relationship. Something Michael knew she not only craved, but also deserved. At the same time, dude looked pretty cold and detached, and it was as clear as the sun that he was not fond of Riley and Ben. What the fuck was that? That was a no-no with Lisa, so why was she still with him? Did he have some secret qualities that Michael hadn’t been able to detect? Like, was he amazing in bed and rocked her world that way? Once again, jealousy seeped into him like acid and Michael chewed at the inside of his cheek until it hurt.

No, impossible. He knew her. He had felt her while they were making love. The way she clung to him. The way her body writhed, her heat. Her passion. She had needed that connection as much as he had. She was starved for intimacy. And her body had responded to him in all the right ways… as usual. His had behaved the same way, and he still hadn’t gotten over it.

God, he hated this! He hated not being sure about anything, not to have control over stuff he cared about! If in the past he had always been confident about Lisa’s feelings for him, all of a sudden they had become foggy and he didn’t know how to react to that. At times she felt distant and remote, disconnected from him, but there were also moments when she would look at him the way she had always done. With love and passion and tenderness. Longing, too. As if she missed him.

Hell, even during his surprise visit at Hidden Hills her eyes had pleaded him to stay, when he had suggested he should get going! Which meant that she didn’t want him to leave, right? And then, that little convo on the staircase… Lisa had sounded as if she had been expected him to call her. When she had been the one rebuffing him when he had asked her if they would meet again.

This was so fucking confusing!

And yet, while they were chatting and playing with the kids, it all had felt so eerily similar to the past, when they were still a family. They had stayed in the kids’ room for almost an hour, and Lisa had sat on Riley’s bed, reveling in the happiness of her children and in the attachment they felt for Michael. Of course, the kids had been ecstatic when he had given them those tickets, and had asked if he would go with them. If only…

Glancing up at Lisa, Michael had noticed how torn she looked. Conflicted. So maybe… possibly…

But no, in the end, she hadn’t said a word. So it was likely that she would bring Roman to the Cirque. Or damn Dopey Danny. To Michael, telling Lisa that she could give the darn fourth ticket to Keough or that other prick she was dating had been as pleasurable as a root canal therapy. But he had managed, alright. He now wondered if she had seen through his bullshit.

After spending time with the kids, he and Lisa had gotten back downstairs – looking for Roman. He was no longer in the family room, and had let his cigar there. The stench filled the room. Glancing outside, Lisa had noticed that he was in the garden, sitting by the pool, talking to someone over the phone.

“I think he’s working… Roman is a very busy man, you know…” She had muttered.

Michael had observed her body language with care. She was uncomfortable and looked ashamed of her boyfriend’s manners.

“I bet…” Sure he was busy enough not to spend a minute with his girlfriend’s kids. And too busy to put out that stinky Havana. Another couple of reasons to dislike him. He was about to ask her if she was happy with him as she said she was, but then had bit his tongue. No. This was not the time nor the place. “Look, I gotta get going. I gotta drive over to my mom’s and pick up the kids.”

Lisa had blinked.

“Sure… Yeah. Hey, thanks for stopping by…” A pause. “And for the flowers… they’re beautiful.”

“Is he OK with it?” Michael had tilted his head in Roman’s direction.

“Of course…” Lisa had let out a long, cleansing breath, then had walked over to the armchair and had taken care of the damn cigar. She was nervous, he could tell, but she was also doing her best to look as comfortable as it came. “Why shouldn’t he be? He’s very, ah… peaceful. And not the jealous type at all.”

“Yeah… Looks like it…” Michael had almost spoken to itself. “Hey, would you mind walking me out to my car?”

It had been his eyes pleading her, this time. And, as usual, the Morse code message had been received just fine.

“Not at all…”

The heavy silence as they walked over to the foyer had acted like a guillotine hanging over the head of a convict. Only, Michael was not in the mood to get beheaded at all. He wanted to live, and the zest for life he had been feeling as of late was something he had not experienced in quite some time. It made him feel daring. It made him feel fearless. As Lisa was about to open the door, he had grabbed her arm and had pulled her close, startling her. Turning her to him, he had rested his hands on her waist.

“Lisa…”

“What…” Her voice had dropped an octave, and he had noticed her eyes turning stormy, moving down to his lips for a second.

“It’s not that I didn’t want to call you…”

“No?…” Her eyes had moved up to his, one more time, and he had almost felt weak in the knees. “What was it, then?”

Only a second earlier, he had known what he wanted to tell her, but at that very moment he recognized his own utter confusion. His brain had started short-circuiting, and he had not even realized what he was doing. He had kissed her, and it was supposed to be a soft, sweet, lingering kiss. Almost a friendly touch, lips on lips. Only, what had transpired had been different.

The kiss had been hot and all-consuming, and it had felt endless and too quick at the same time. The moment his lips had touched Lisa’s, her hands had been in his hair and her tongue in his mouth. Michael had felt dizzy, his head had started to spin, and without even knowing what the heck he was doing, he had pushed her against the wall near the front door, his body pressing against her. She was burning and long-forgotten memories of so many moments like that one, in that same area of the house, had started to replay in a never-ending loop behind his closed eyelids. They had made love in that foyer countless times in the past, when they were together. Or when they were not. Or when he was married to someone else. Or when she was seeing some uninfluential dude. It had never mattered one bit, as the passion they felt for one another could not be ignored. Sometimes, those hot kisses had been nothing but foreplay before the main course of the night. Some other times, he had unzipped his pants in a hurry – or had let Lisa do that for him – and undressed her just enough to take her there and then, against the wall. Against the door. On the carpet. On the small table near the mirror.

“Lisa… Lisa…” He had whispered the words and delivered them in between kisses and small bites. Her hands had run from his hair down over his chest, and he had remembered. He was supposed to tell her that what had happened at the Hideout shouldn’t be happening again. While at that very moment the only thing Michael wanted was to have her again and have her forever. Lunacy. Absolute insanity.

Why, oh why, had he never desired Zoe the same way? Or any other woman, for that matter? Why none of the girls he had slept with had never been able to evoke such barrage of feelings and emotions? Of course, it was not their fault. It was on him and nobody else. He was cursed that way.

In the car, on his way home, Michael closed his eyes and shook his head, as his thoughts came back to that last kiss in the entrance hall once again. He had not cared about Roman. If anything, a part of him had hoped he would appear, just to get everything out in the open and force a reaction. Not out of him, Michael didn’t care about him at all, but out of Lisa.

Brother… You want that for what? You been screwing another woman for months, and even after you got Lisa again. You been keeping a foot in both camps. You arrogant, jealous, possessive asshole. You want her to be yours and can’t stand the idea of her giving it to some other dude, but can’t stop tapping that other thing, can you?

Yeah. Well, no. Not exactly. It was not that he couldn’t stop seeing Zoe. He just didn’t want to be alone right now. He was also afraid Lisa would end up running for the hills again, if she came back in a spur of the moment kinda thing. He couldn’t risk that. Not again. One year earlier, their final breakup had about destroyed him.

Mike… But you know damn well you got what you asked for, back then. You pushed and pushed and pushed all the wrong buttons. And you knew it. What was she supposed to stay for? After the way you treated her? Like a…

He shook his head once again. No – that was a thing of the past. He was sorry, regretful, and felt guilty about having lashed out on her. And not even in an overt manner, because that was not his style. He had been way more subtle than that. More lethal.

Right? Correct. And so she ran. ‘Cause you guys hadn’t been going anywhere. So don’t you blame it on her. Not this time.

But she knew. Now Lisa knew. That night at the Hideout, he had told her.

Nah, you haven’t… Come on now.

Michael chewed on his lips. Well, OK. Not with words anyway. But he knew she had understood how sorry he was. It was all in the way he had touched her, kissed her, made love to her as if it was the most important thing. His body had spoken in absolutes.

And then you told her that life goes on. Perfect strategy to have her come back to you for good.

It was not that. It was that he hadn’t healed. Not all the way. A part of him wanted Lisa, craved her, missed her when she was not around, to the point that even text messages were now better than complete absence and deafening silence. The night spent with her at his place had taught him that much. And yet there was another part of him, the dark place he called it, which hadn’t healed at all. That part was easy to reign over when he was with anybody else. Even with Zoe. He knew how to hide it and how to control himself and his reactions. But Lisa was different. With Lisa, he had no defenses. He could be at his best and his worst with her. He could be himself. And she could do and be the same with him. What if she came back and he made the same mistakes? What if they made the same mistakes and ended up tearing each other apart one more time?

Anyway, no… Roman had not appeared in the hall while they were kissing like starved teenagers. Not even when she had coped a feel, discovering that he was sprung like all get out, her small hand brushing his hard-on and feeling like the most perfect thing imaginable. Caressing him ever so slightly through the denim. Not even when his lips had trailed down her neck and his hand had come up, cupping her breast, his hips pressing against her.

Roman had not caught them and had not stopped them. Lisa had. At one point she had backed off, and Michael had focused on her eyes. The almost liquid blue of her irises swimming in barely concealed tears. She had held his head in her hands, staring at him for a long moment, breathless and flustered. Her lips parted, red. Moist. Michael had about lost the last bit of control he had left. He had almost scooped her up and taken her away with him.

Blood thundering in his ears, he had spoken while his brain was still malfunctioning.

“Come with me… Let’s go…”

“Where?”

“Somewhere. Anywhere…”

She had blinked and swallowed. Then she had pulled his head down, leaning her forehead against his.

“You gotta go…” It had been nothing but a whisper, but as loud as a gunshot in his heart. “Michael… You need to leave now.”

She had kissed him again. With abandon and a sense of longing, but also in a hurry. Then she had pushed him back and off her. He knew it had taken her all her willpower to do so.

And so he had left.

Right now, as he started to see the lights of the ranch from afar, Michael found himself trying hard to analyze how he felt. It was not as easy as it looked. He was jumbled up, confused. He wondered if what he felt for Lisa was nothing but lust, the reminiscence of their ancient attraction, or something that went beyond the no doubt explosive physical aspect of their relationship. Did he feel that way about her because he missed her? Because he… loved her? Still? No. Impossible perspective, and a dangerous one, too.

The gates opened and his phone rang, almost giving him a heart attack.

“Shit… What the hell…” He mumbled under his breath as he extracted the cell phone from his jacket. Paying attention not to wake up the kids, both asleep in the back seats. Hoping it was Lisa. But no. It wasn’t her.

A couple of hours later, Lisa called Alecia from the car. As the sun finally disappeared behind a blanket of complete darkness, she knew that sooner or later she would have to stop and head back home, or at least decide where she would go. So far, she had done nothing but driving around with no clear destination in mind.

After almost throwing Michael out, the moment she had realized that she would be lost forever if he kissed her again, she had gone back into the family room just as Roman opened the French doors and stepped in, too. He was oblivious of what had happened in the hall only minutes earlier and still very much engrossed in his call. Glancing at Lisa, he had grabbed the newspaper from the couch and had headed upstairs, all the while discussing the specifics of what she supposed was his umpteenth business trip.

Flustered, hot, bothered and frustrated, she had followed him to the bedroom and had observed him as he threw his trolley on the bed.

“Oh no… It’s not going to be a problem. Oh, I know all employees were taken by surprise by our takeover…” He had snorted into the phone. “Of course I don’t… Why should I care? Business is business. Look, I tell you what: I’m going to be there in a few hours. Yeah… I sure don’t wanna miss the meeting, tomorrow.”

Of course not. He could miss anything, including his girlfriend shoving her tongue down another man’s throat, in the other room, but not a business meeting. Lisa shook her head and realized that her thoughts were unfair and distasteful. Was she trying to blame Roman for all that? Roman who, if anything, trusted her enough to leave her with her former husband unsupervised? It was fucked up. She was a mess. Roman wasn’t at fault – she was. She could try and turn the tables as much as she wanted, but the reality didn’t change: she hadn’t been screwing, kissing, missing, craving Michael because Roman was a lousy partner, but only because she was not in love with him. And she always had known that. After seeing Michael again at the ranch, she had started to suspect that Roman was nothing but another casualty in the mess that her relationship with Michael was. A bad case of fight fire with fire, only Roman was a tiny little flame compared to Michael’s wildfire.

She was still staring into space when he finally had hung up the phone.

“Hey, uhm… Albert called me. The acquisition went well, but the employees are… baffled, I guess. I gotta go to Detroit.”

“OK…” Lisa had leaned against the door frame, crossing her arms over her chest. It was obvious that she was upset and she knew it. She had always been a bad actress. But if Roman perceived something, he didn’t do anything about it. He finished packing and then went to the bathroom. He locked the door and Lisa just stayed quiet, letting the silence in the room spin around her like a breeze. Then she heard him flush the toilet.

He had reemerged from the bathroom whistling a tune. Nothing put him in a good mood like purchasing companies. He was a shark and reveled in his predatory business approach.

“I’m gonna call you when I land, OK?” He had stepped closer and had bent his head to kiss her. Lisa had turned her face slightly, and his lips had landed on the corner of her mouth. She couldn’t bring herself to suck face with him after just having made out with Michael in the foyer. It was too much. And even worse was realizing that, once again, she didn’t feel guilty at all.

“Sure… Alright.”

And so he had left. And as Roman walked over to his car, Danny had shown up to take the kids, because it was his turn to have them for the weekend and they had planned to go to Malibu Lagoon State Beach. And just like that, Lisa had found herself all alone in that big-ass house she once had inhabited with the only man she truly longed for. She had felt wired and unable to rest and, after trying to munch something in front of the TV, she had decided to go for a drive. Not really knowing where, wandering around like some crazy chicken.

Leish was the last anchor to her mental sanity. Thank God she picked up almost right away.

“Hey, girlfriend!” She was cheerful and happy. As usual. Lisa smiled.

“Hi, Leish…”

“…Why do you sound… so weird?”

“Do I?” Lisa stared at the dark road as she kept driving.

“You do! What happened? You OK?”

She shook her head. Where was she supposed to begin? Leish preceded her with her spidey senses.

“Does this have anything to do with… you know who?”

“I guess it does. Remember when I told you that Mike and I were going to have lunch… together?”

“Of course. Did you end up fucking in the restaurant? And it’s Mike again, now? Oh wow… Well, cool.”

“No, nothing at all happened. I left almost immediately.”

“You did? Alright. Then why are you telling me? ‘Cause you wish something did happen?”

“No, it’s not that. I saw him again… afterward. Twice. Once at the ranch, and then at his apartment… You know, the Hideout.”

“Did you guys fuck on the Ferris wheel?”

“God, Leish. Why do you keep assuming he and I fucked?” Lisa scratched her neck.

“I don’t know, because of past experiences? Go on.”

“Nothing happened at Neverland. Well, we almost kissed – but nothing happened and I left again.”

“OK… Frustrating. And then? What about the Hideout?”

“Everything happened.” Lisa sighed.

“You mean the usual fighting and fucking routine happened?”

“No, we didn’t fight at all. It just felt so different than last year. We were so in tune… at peace despite all this mess… and we just… I ended up… We made love. All night.”

“I am so not surprised.” Alecia didn’t sound like she was, indeed. “Besides, the fact that you said made love and not fucked is interesting. Have you thought about that?”

She hadn’t. She wasn’t comfortable at all thinking about Michael in those terms again. Too dangerous. A potentially fatal mistake, if she didn’t pay attention.

“No, I got too much other shit going on right now. Anyway, then he told me that life goes on and I went back home to Roman… So it would be pointless anyway, right?”

“Ah…” Alecia didn’t sound amused. Big whoop. Lisa knew her friend always had preferred Michael anyway. In Leish’s mind, he was the only man able to tame Lisa’s “attitude”, as she called it. While Lisa still believed he was the best at unleashing it in all its horrid splendor. Perspectives. “What else? Because I kinda have a feeling this is not all of it.”

“Well… Michael came to visit today. At Hidden Hills, while Roman was there. He totally blindsided me ’cause you know, he hadn’t called. But anyway… He had a present for the kids… and flowers for me.”

Lisa heard Leish’s husky laughter in the receiver.

“Ah, the King of Pop and his flowers. He is a romantic guy, though, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. But that’s not the point. Before he left we kissed again. He kissed me. And I let him.”

“With Roman in the house? Brazen!”

“He didn’t see.”

“Well, I would hope not. Roman doesn’t seem the kind of dude who would go for a threesome…”

“Leish! Could you please be serious for a minute? My brain is melting here!”

“I am very serious! Lisa…” Alecia cleared her throat. “What’s the matter? Are you in love with Roman now? I don’t think you are. Otherwise, I doubt you’d be making out with Michael. Right? You are not that kind of girl. Which makes me assume that you still have feelings for the guy. And he seems to feel the same. Because as far as you always told me, Michael doesn’t do casual that much.”

“No, he does not. But then why did he tell me that life goes on, after we made love? As if… you know, as if he wanted to get rid of me. As if he didn’t want me to stay.” The moment she said the words out loud, Lisa felt the stinging feeling of repressed tears. So far she had never cried over Michael. Not as of late, at least. She felt quite proud of herself.

“Well, maybe he’s confused just like you seem to be. Or maybe he read… you know, your signs. ‘Cause sure as fuck you can be baffling at times, Lisa. And maybe he just was trying to protect himself.”

“Protect himself? From what? Leish, he’s dating another woman!”

“And you’re dating another man. Does that mean that you aren’t pining over Michael?”

Lisa stayed quiet. She knew Alecia was right. But she wasn’t ready to go there. The pain of the previous year was still too raw.

“Lisa… Why don’t you just ask him how he feels about you?”

“How can I ask him that, when I don’t even know how I feel?”

“I am not sure that’s the truth. But I don’t think you’re ready to feel what you feel. And that’s why you went back to Roman. ‘Cause he’s safer. And boring as fuck – but that’s what you need right now. I guess.” She paused. “Well, why don’t you ask… Mike’s sister?”

Lisa flinched. “Janet? No… She and I… are not so close anymore.”

It was another sad truth about her current life. Lisa and Janet had been the staunchest allies back in the day. Janet had taken Lisa’s side again and again, to the point that she had even stopped talking to her brother for a while, while he was busy giving Lisa the silent treatment while she tried to find her way back to him, during their divorce. But as the years passed their friendship had cooled off, and despite still loving each other dearly, Lisa and Janet had drifted apart.

“OK… Well. Where are you, by the way? Sounds like you’re in a car.”

“I’ve been driving for an hour. I don’t even know where I should go.”

“You should go wherever you want. Where would you wanna be now, Lise?”

In Michael’s arms. Easy answer. The most unspeakable one.

“I don’t know.”

Bullshit. And Alecia knew it.

“What did Michael say? When he kissed you, I mean?”

Silence.

“Lisa..?”

“He asked me to go with him. Anywhere.”

“Damn… That’s… some serious shit, Lise. And you still think he’s been doing this just for the sake of it? For real? Are you that blind?”

“I wanna be. I need to be. Better to be blind than blinded, Leish.”

“Not sure I get what you mean. But maybe you jumped in the car for a reason, you know? Maybe you know exactly where you wanna go. And maybe you should… you know, do what your heart tells you to do.”

“Are you getting all sentimental on me?” Lisa laughed, but it came out forced and dry.

“Fuck, no. I just want some fresh porn story. So… produce it.”

Lisa scoffed at Alecia’s idea, but when she hung up the phone, she did drive over to Neverland. She knew Michael was there. He had told the kids, during his visit at Hidden Hills. And of course, they had asked Lisa if they could go with him. At that moment, Michael’s eyes had glanced up at her and she had seen that longing look once again. A mixture of hope and fear. But how could it be? Michael was afraid of nothing and nobody.

And besides, she didn’t even know why she was going there. But when she stopped the car in front of the gates, the guard opened them without a word. It seemed like Lisa still had a full-access pass when it came to Michael. As she slowly drove over to Michael’s private quarters, she wondered if it had been that way even before she and Michael started to communicate again or if he had revoked his order only lately. But it was nice to see that he didn’t seem bothered at the idea of having her there without even calling him first. Which, on a side note, was exactly what he had done earlier that day, when he had shown up at her house unannounced. Now she could return the favor.

As snarky as she pretended to be, Lisa felt actually giddy at the idea of seeing Michael again. His words replayed in her mind in an endless loop: “Come with me. Let’s go. Somewhere. Anywhere.” Dizziness almost overcame her at the thought of just… leaving. For a while. With him. And as she pulled over under a huge tree and turned off the engine, memories of their night together assaulted her once again without any forewarning. She didn’t think he had an inkling of how he had made her feel. How pampered, loved, cared for. It hadn’t been just about the sex, although that part had been soul-shattering. It had been his body, but also his soul. The way he had looked at her, his dark eyes shining in the dim light of the room. The way he had touched her, his hands running over her skin as if he was rediscovering her after centuries apart. The way he had kissed her – as if he really meant it.

Lisa swallowed, her eyes lowering and staring at her own hands, clasped in her lap. She knew Alecia was right, and it didn’t matter how confusing it was: sooner or later she would have to deal with those feelings she was struggling so hard to repress. Not even succeeding most of the times. And whatever the outcome, or cost, she had to be ready to handle it. It was true, Lisa was confused and torn, and not ready to face the complexity and capacity of her own emotions. But she also knew herself and was aware she would not be bottling up too long anyway. She had to be ready.

And perhaps being with Michael right now would help her clear the fog beclouding her mind. Besides, he had offered…

She finally was able to bring herself to open the door and jump off the car. She glanced at the house, at its windows. A light was coming from the inside, she could tell despite the heavy curtains. Which means that he was there. Or so Lisa hoped.

Her hands trembling for no reason whatsoever, she knocked on the door and at first she didn’t hear a sound. For a second it occurred to her that Michael might be resting, but glancing at her watch she noticed that it was way too early for his standards. Well… it was possible that he’d be able to sleep just fine later, with her help. She waited, then knocked again. And this time she heard noises coming from inside the duplex. Someone climbing down the stairs that led to Michael’s bedroom. Lisa took a deep breath and straightened her back and, when he finally opened the door, she smiled.

Michael’s face was flushed, his hair a bit of a mess. He only wore a robe, with nothing underneath. And sounded slightly… out of breath. His eyes were huge, and he looked like a deer caught in the headlights. The smile slowly vanished from Lisa’s face. Bit after bit, almost in slow motion. An eternal ellipsis in a moment that lasted nothing but a bunch of seconds.

“Lisa… Hey…”

“Hey…” She spoke in a whisper, but it was as if she could no longer feel her own body.

She knew what he had been doing. And no, he had not been waiting for her. To take her away with him. Somewhere. Anywhere. The fact that he did not invite her in only confirmed her suspicions. His embarrassment was apparent. His eyes full of guilt and what looked like shame were just as obvious. Lisa didn’t need to know more. She was about to spin on her heels and leave when, behind Michael’s shoulders, she saw something moving. Someone. A woman. Zoe, or so she presumed.

Lisa’s feet stayed rooted in place despite her intense desire to just have the ground open and swallow her whole.

When Zoe touched Michael’s back, he about jumped out of his skin and turned to look at her as if he had forgotten she was even there. But he hadn’t. Of course not.

“Michael… Who’s this?” The girl, not even thirty, and definitely a model, only had one of his t-shirts on. She stared at Lisa and something twitched on her face. Then she smiled, but it looked utterly fake. “Oh, wait… I know who you are.”

“No, you don’t.” Lisa’s voice came out a bit raspier than she intended. But she couldn’t help it. Her throat felt like sandpaper mixed with broken glass. She could almost hear the fragments shattering in her stomach.

“Yes, I do.” Tilting her head, the girl rested her arm around Michael’s shoulders and Lisa saw him flinch, his brow furrowing. He stared at Lisa for another moment, blushing, then lowered his eyes. “You’re Lisa Marie. The girl in the sex tape.” Her sly grin only made Lisa want to slap it off her face. The girl in the sex tape?

“Fuck you, lipgloss.” This time she turned and climbed down the three stairs that led to the pathway, rubbing her forehead. Feeling like the biggest idiot on the planet. Wanting to puke. “God fucking dammit.”

The noise made by the gravel under her feet sounded deafening in her buzzing ears and, at first, she didn’t even notice Michael running after her. Turning her head slightly, she saw Zoe still leaning against the door frame, her long legs naked, that cocky ass grin still plastered on her face. As if she belonged there. Goddamnit!

“Lisa… Lisa Marie… Please… Wait… Can you stop? For a second?” He was breathless. Why? What the fuck did he want now? Hadn’t he humiliated her enough? Or, even better, hadn’t she humiliated herself enough for one day? Allowing him to kiss her in her own house while her boyfriend was outside near the pool, letting him feel her up, seduce her with those eyes and those words, and then open the door when it was so self-evident that he had been fucking his supermodel girlfriend? Fuck that shit!

She tried to walk quicker, but he was faster. Of course. She was searching for her car keys when he touched her elbow and Lisa spun around, pointing her finger at him.

“Don’t touch me! Or I will kick your fucking nuts up in your throat.”

Michael’s hand fell at his side, and he swallowed.

“God, this is so fucked up…” He blinked and looked down, again. “This is not the right time.”

“That’s for fucking sure.” She somehow was able to clutch to her car keys. She was shaking from head to toe. “Move the hell away.”

“No, I ain’t moving. I need you to wait a minute and listen to me.”

Lisa took a deep breath. She looked at him, and their eyes finally met. Hers were nothing like he had seen lately.

“And I don’t need any of this shit right now. So don’t force my hand. We can play who’s the better asshole if you want, but I guarantee you I’ll win.”

He seemed to weight up her words, then relented. He backed off.

“Can I call you later? I wanna explain…”

“Go fuck yourself, Michael. Or her. I don’t care.”

While she drove back to the gates, his figure standing there, motionless on the pathway, was the last thing she saw in the rearview mirror before her eyes became fixed on the road. And flooded with tears.