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Chapter 10 | Decode

 

intimate (adj.)

1630s, “closely acquainted, very familiar,” also “inmost, intrinsic,” from Late Latin intimatus, past participle of intimare “make known, announce, impress,” from Latin intimus “inmost, innermost, deepest” (adj.), also used figuratively, of affections, feelings, as a noun, “close friend;” superlative of in “in” (from PIE root *en “in”). Intimate (adj.) used euphemistically in reference to women’s underwear from 1904. Related: Intimately.

 

 

It was astonishing how the mere physical contact, skin on skin, lips on lips, was more than enough to erase any rational plan from her mind. The moment she had opened the bathroom door, Lisa had been one hundred percent convinced she would just ask him to leave, to go back to his penthouse suite and forget about the dangerous dance they had been dancing for hours.

The shift in intention had come when she had found his eyes. They were dark, solemn and dignified and held a gravitas that she had never seen before. There was something new in there. It was like something had clicked inside of Michael. She knew it was because of the words she had muttered – the things she had told Doctor Mcfadden about him.

This baby is going to have one hell of a father.

At that very moment, a part of her brain she didn’t remember being functional at all had ordered her body to move. And not toward the main door in the foyer, no. Her hands had come up, grabbing his head, pulling it down to her. She had sought his lips and she had found them right away. It was clear to her that Michael had been taken aback by her sudden aggression, and that he had no defenses, but he had recovered quickly.

And yet she was the one taking the reins. He just let her. When she started dragging him toward the bedroom, he just followed and all the while kept kissing her with a hunger that felt ancient. He had been starving for this as much as she had, and the realization created havoc in her heart. Why? She pushed the question aside. No. Not now. Maybe not ever.

“Here…” Lisa swallowed as she took his hands and guided him near the king-size bed. “Michael…”

“Yes, baby… Tell me… Talk to me…” He was flustered, panting already. She glanced down and noticed the tent in his pants. He was crazy sprung. How could he be so aroused? They hadn’t even started yet. This was complete lunacy!

“I’m just so fucking horny…” She murmured, helplessly.

He chuckled. “Yeah… I know… come here… We got this.”

He pulled her closer and kissed her again. Slow, deep kisses that only heightened her frenzy and comforted her at the same time. This man just knew how to touch her. He knew how to turn embers into blazing flames. His scent, his taste, the texture of his skin and hair, the scratchy sensation of his night stubble under her fingertips felt like augmented reality. Everything was magnified. She knew, from experience, that sex with Michael was always a mind-blowing experience, but this was uncharted territory. It was the first time they were together that way since the conception of their baby. A timid melody hummed in her soul, echoing into her nerve endings. She knew she could trust him with this.

Suddenly, she pulled back and stared straight at him. “Michael… You don’t have to do this if you don’t feel like it. I mean, I don’t want you to feel forced to… just because I am… you know…”

Holding her gaze, he bit his lip and took her hand, bringing it down and to his groin, pressing it against his flesh. He tilted his head.

“Does it feel like I don’t wanna do this?”

Gosh. She was going to come just by massaging his cock. She was such in deep shit! Again! But this could be part of it all, right? Together with taking baby classes and buying strollers and reading baby food labels and devising birth plans. She had to face it: it didn’t matter how good she thought she was at lying to herself, her emotions were going haywire and the withdrawal had finally kicked in. A healthy sex life while pregnant was strongly recommended, and deprivation was a motherfucker. Plus, she didn’t love torture that much.

She started stroking him through the cotton fabric of his jammies and, when he closed his eyes and swallowed, his hand still covering her own, she became mesmerized by the movement of his Adam’s apple. He was as hard as a rock and feverishly hot. Lisa wondered if anyone had taken care of his needs during the months they had spent apart.

“Lise…”

“Mh…”

With great difficulty, he opened his eyes.

“There’s something you gotta know…”

Oh, no. There it was. The cold shower. What the fuck was he gonna say to her? That he had been screwing every possible woman from California to London? That he had changed his mind? That he didn’t find her physically appealing at all? What?

“What?”

“I’m so fucking turned on by your body… You have no idea.”

Exhaling a sigh of relief, rolling her eyes, she stepped closer and again framed his face with both hands, bringing his mouth down to her. God, his lips. His kisses. They were magical. He would kiss her and it always felt like he was already making love to her. The idea of letting anybody else take care of this particular aspect of their pregnancy moved farther and farther away… Just like the idea of allowing any other woman to help him relax that way. Why did the mere thought make her feel rattled? Habit, probably. Possessiveness. Nothing else.

Between little pecks on her lips, her cheeks, her neck, Michael started unbuttoning her shirt with trembling hands.

“I’ve read that… during pregnancy… orgasms can be more… pleasurable… and intense… because of oxytocin…” His hand rested, palm flat, on her barely visible baby bump and he looked down. “Oh shit… I can’t believe I can finally do this.”

She ignored the tingling sensation of tears rising behind her half-closed eyelids. How could he be so sweet and sexy at the same time? Damn him! Covering his hand with her own, she slowly pushed it down and inside her sweater pants.

“We’ll see what you can do about what you just said… And then I’ll let you know if you were right.”

In all honesty, she knew he was. He breached the barrier of her underwear with his fingers and the moment he touched her, stroked her back and forth gently a few times, she shattered into a million pieces. It took her maybe five seconds to come. What was this fuckery?! Her legs unsteady, she staggered and he held her by the waist as she buried her face in his chest and moaned, inhaling his scent, wonderful and manly. OK. All good. He got her. She was safe with him. At least when it came to this.

“Gosh, baby… I guess I was right…” Michael chuckled, breathlessly. “You OK?”

“Fucking hell… Yeah… you were probably right…”

He pushed her pants and underwear down and, just as swiftly, she took off her shirt. She wore nothing underneath. As she stepped over her clothes and went into his arms once again, she found him staring down at her. His face was flushed, his eyes looked bright. “You’re out of your mind if you think I’mma let anybody else take care of you…”

Why did his words unleash a flock of hummingbirds in her chest? OK. Enough with the questions. She needed to move things along. She needed him.

“Take this off…” She pushed his t-shirt up and started kissing his tense abdominals, his solid chest. All the while, her hands slid down and grabbed the waistband of his pajama pants. “These, too… We don’t need them…”

“Fuck… You’re gonna drive me nuts…” Hopping on one foot, he got rid of his pants and briefs. Although he liked his alpha role in bed, he loved how assertive she was tonight. “Alright… Here… Shit…”

Lisa laughed, then took his hand again and pulled him on the bed with her. Their limbs entangled as they kissed and kissed. Their hands roaming on naked skin, getting reacquainted with the intensity of their physical connection. She had missed this. It was painful to realize. Agonizing and beautiful at the same time.

Pushing her down on her back, propped up on his elbow, Michael slowly traced her breasts. She gasped. Once again that wonderment in his eyes.

“Oh… So sensitive here, baby girl…” He bent his head and kissed the slope of her breast, then moved over to her nipple, licking it, taking it into his mouth. Lisa arched up against him, feeling completely uninhibited. She did love her curvier, more voluptuous body, and his granite erection pressing against her side told her that he liked it, too. She held his head down, wanting to feel him that way. And she trembled.

“It’s OK…” His warm whisper against her skin felt like a breath of life. “We ain’t in a hurry… God, you’re so beautiful… So sexy… Tell me, baby. Tell me what you feel… tell me what you need… I gotta make you feel good…” His words were interrupted by kisses, gentle bites, by his tongue tracing a hot route on her breasts and collarbone. Lisa’s head started to spin.

“Lise…”

“Michael… Mike… Kiss me…”

His mouth slanted over hers again, and she held him close to her, wrapping her arms around his neck, wanting the contact never to end. Every sensation felt heightened, and she was not sure it was just pregnancy-related. Great sex was like a delicious cookie. You couldn’t have a bite and stop. You craved it.

Once again, his kisses descended and she exhaled a long sigh. His unshaved chin scraping the delicate skin of her neck made her shiver in anticipation. She took his hand and rested it on her breast. There, too, her skin felt tingly, tender, unusually sensitive to the touch. Michael was right: they didn’t have to rush – they could slow down and enjoy every minute of this. Forgetting about everything else, for once.

“Shit…”

His teeth on her. She loved it. However, she noticed he was being way tamer than usual, as if he was afraid of hurting her. Her hand closed in a fist on the back of his head, in his curls. He lifted his head.

“Mike…”

“What?”

“Don’t hold back… You won’t hurt me…”

His eyes were moist, and he was starting to sweat. He looked so sexy.

“Whatcha want, girl? Whatcha want me to do?”

Lisa watched him from behind half-closed eyelids. She bit her lip.

“Everything… I wanna do everything… Everything that comes to your mind…”

His eyes widened and his hand gripped her breast tighter. She moaned. She needed to touch him and her hand traveled down, until she found him. The tactile experience of his hardness, its warmth, set off a new set of fireworks inside. They were kissing, and her eyes were closed, and she realized how she had almost forgotten how big and perfect he was. Almost…

 

 

“You’re just so magnificent down here, baby…” She gently kissed his lower abdomen, then his thigh. Her fingertips caressed his length. She glanced up at him. He was looking down at her, his lips parted, his naked chest rising and falling rapidly. “…You could be dick-modeling…”

His eyes looked surprised for a second, then he chuckled.

“Lisa…!” He caressed her hair, then traced the side of her face.

“I’m serious… I mean, just in case you’re considering working two jobs…” But she, too, was smiling.

Michael bent over and pulled her up by her shoulders. Then, still laughing, he kissed her.

 

 

She backed off and then showered his face with feathery kisses. Underneath her lips, his eyelashes felt wet. Her hand gripped his cock and started to stroke it. Michael sighed, their foreheads touched. And although both their visions were blurred, their eyes remained connected. In a mirror image of what she was doing, he too reached down and in between her legs and began caressing her. Lisa’s gaze started to become unfocused.

“That’s it…” Paying maximum attention not to hurt her, but just to give her pleasure, his fingers probed her, then entered her slowly. “Baby… this is just so hot… touching you like this…”

Lisa whimpered, her fist closing on him even tighter. Michael swallowed and exerted maximum control over himself. He was so turned on by their little foreplay that he risked coming right away. And he didn’t want that.

“Shit… Oh, damn…” Lisa draped her leg around his hip. The rhythmical movements of her hand intensified, while her other hand came up, tangling in his hair. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, taking a deep breath, trying to distance himself from a physical pleasure so intense, that risked to engulf him.

“Careful down there, baby girl…”

Her internal muscles started to flutter, and he gently stopped her hand from moving on him. In a fluid movement, he slid down her body – all the while paying maximum attention to each of her reactions – and spread her legs. Glancing up, she noted her aqua eyes tethered on him. His mouth closed on her pulsing sex and her hips jerked up, her head sinking back into the pillow. Her heavy breathing was broken by a loud moan, and the fluttering intensified. Michael closed his eyes and got lost in her, kissing her, licking her, taking her that way until a powerful climax made her convulse and shake underneath his touch, her hips rocking against his mouth. He could not discern her barely breathed out words when she finally calmed down. But it was OK. She was there, and his heart threatened to burst in his chest, and that was all that mattered. He gently slid back up, leaving a trail of kisses over her belly, stomach and chest, smiling when her arms came around his torso, holding him close.

“You taste like heaven, baby… I missed this… I missed everything about you…”

Her eyes glanced up at him and she blinked. And he saw it. The glimmering of tears. Tears that didn’t fall but were definitely there. Cradling his face in her small hands, her thumbs traced his bottom lip and she kissed him. Once again, her pelvis rocked up and against him. God… she really was starving. He was too.

Her low, husky voice brought him back to the moment. “Mike… I want you so much…”

He guessed this was as close as a declaration of love he could get. At least for now. He kissed her lips, very gently, very slowly.

“Oh, I want you too… Can’t you tell?”

The moment they were living was unique. The lust, the burning passion were overwhelming – as usual. But there was something else, too. A lack of inhibition, an openness that reminded him of their early years, when everything was discovery and exploration. And there was also tenderness, and attention to every movement, every caress, every kiss, every look. It felt like a beginning some sort. And although their fears and concerns and sorrows were still there, somewhere, right now they were silent and immobile.

 

 

 

 

Standing in a kneeling position between her open legs, Michael rested his hands on Lisa’s knees and watched her flushed skin, her bright eyes, her wild hair. She looked like a little goddess. So gorgeous and perfect. And not only she was the woman he still loved – she also was going to be the mother of his daughter. That awareness wasn’t always there. It would come and go, like a tidal wave. From a merely rational point of view, of course, he knew what was happening, but his heart and soul often tended to short-circuit when trying to elaborate on everything. Its intensity too much to bear at times.

And yet at that moment, it all became so very clear. When she had opened the bathroom door and had stared at him, he had thought she was going to send him back to his room. He had thought he had pushed it too much and that she would be retreating – protected and safe into her corner. A corner where he was no longer invited.

But no. She had kissed him instead, and he had felt her body warming up. Her soul, too, letting go of something cold and heavy that had been part of her for quite some time now, not only for the previous four months, but since he had iced her out during the divorce. It was true, she had started the avalanche. But he, too, had found more than one way to strike back, cut her open, and make her bleed. As he finally undressed her, for the first time he had realized the pain he had inflicted – and, just like her, he regretted it. Neither one of them had ever wanted to hurt the other.

And yet, despite their baggage, Lisa had said those words to Doctor Mcfadden. That their baby girl would have one hell of a father. It had struck Michael. It had made him want to be something else too – he had made him feel like he could be one hell of a partner, as well.

When Lisa had shattered in his arms and told him that she wanted him, and he had seen her tears barely kept at bay, shimmering behind the blue surface of her irises, something else had hit him. Apparently, he had convinced her that they could be closer and more intimate while navigating this pregnancy. But he now knew he would also take the chance to make her fall in love with him all over again. Or to remind her why she loved him. Because he did love her so much – still, always – and, as difficult as she could be at times, she was worth fighting the good fight. And despite what she thought, it was not just because of the baby. The baby had brought them closer again, but there was so much more than that.

“Mike… Don’t…”

He blinked and looked down at her, smiling hesitantly.

“What?” His hands were still on her knees and she sat up, covering them with her own. He looked down: her small, tanned hands over his bigger, stronger ones.

“Don’t stop… Don’t leave… Not now.”

He inhaled sharply. He knew what she meant.

“I ain’t leaving, Lise. I promise.”

Her hand closed over his erection once again.

“Then stay.” She started to caress him, slowly, methodically. “Stay right here.”

He swallowed and it was his turn to cover her hand with his own, gripping himself tighter, setting the rhythm. Slowly, Lisa withdrew her hand, her eyes fixed on his movements, as if she were hypnotized.

“Oh, baby… yes. Oh yeah… I love it when you take care of yourself… I love watching you…”

Yeah well, she should watch the way she talked to him, ‘cause if she didn’t tone it down a notch or two, the taking care would be over soon. Panting slightly, his lips parted, his gaze unfocused, he kept going, his erection straining and painful in his hand. He was like a loaded weapon. And her eyes on him… they were an added turn-on. The levels he could reach with her. He had never felt so comfortable with any other woman. Never so safe.

“There you go, Michael…. You are so gorgeous. How can you ever think you’re anything but that…”

When her hands came around his body, resting on his ass, and her lips closed on his cock for a moment, he about lost it. His moans only edged her on further and, with his free hand, he held onto her shoulder.

“Fuck… Holy shit.” He gritted his teeth and pulled back with immense effort. “Baby girl… I can’t wait… I gotta be inside of you… Lie down…”

Lisa let go of him and looked up. Her eyes were sweet, vulnerable. She did what she was told, her perfect naked body on display for him. It felt almost unreal. But, as dreamy as all of this was, he had to keep his head on his shoulders as much as he could.

“Lisa… I can… You know, I can go grab a condom if you want… I mean, if you…” He swallowed. God, this was so difficult. So painful. And yet he had to ask – knowing well that her answer could have positive or negative implications. It would speak the unspoken.

She bit her lip, her eyes blue and mysterious.

“You think you need it?” A lopsided smirk. “’Cause I don’t think we really need birth control now, do we?”

He exhaled. It looked like she, too, had her ways to find out what she wanted to know. However, he needed everything to be very clear. Whether this was going to be a new beginning or a one-time thing, honesty and openness had to come first.

“I haven’t been with anyone… since you and I made love.”

Her face inscrutable, she seemed to let his words linger a bit. Then she reached over, touching the side of his thigh.

“Then we don’t need anything.”

Phew. Wow. Her candid observation produced great glee and relief. The invisible burden on his heart dissolved and, with a smile, he leaned forward, his bodyweight entirely on his arms, and bent his head, kissing her again. Kissing her forever. He wanted her with an intensity that scared him, but he was also aware that he had to pay attention to how they did this. He didn’t want to hurt the baby… or her.

Lisa’s hands on his butt pulled him closer.

“I wanna feel your weight on me…”

“Lise… you sure it’s OK? The baby…”

“The baby is fine…” One more kiss, her mouth sucking on his neck. “…I promise.”

Well, nobody knew more than she did.

He lay down on her, turning her slightly to the side for good measure. All the while, their eyes stayed connected. He pulled her leg in between his and draped the other over his hips. His steel caressed her, back and forth, with extreme gentleness. Immediately, Lisa moaned, rocking her pelvis up. OK. He couldn’t wait any longer. Biting his lip, very carefully, he penetrated her inch after inch, his top leg angled just right, pressing against her sensitive core as he finally seated fully inside of her.

“OK?” He panted.

“God… Oh yeah. Oh… shit… Keep going…” Her body trembled, and she pulled his head down, kissing him again. As he started to move, with slow, deep thrusts, he felt her nails scraping his back. She ground up against his inner thigh, finding her rhythm and the stimulation she so obviously craved. His ears buzzed from the intense pleasure, and he tossed his head.

This was just so intimate. The cuddling, the kissing, as arousing as the sex act in itself. Keeping his motions slow and precise, he alternated thrusting with grinding and circular movements and she came again within minutes, her body flushed and sweaty and so sexy, so gorgeous. The idea of making love to her again – of her being pregnant with his baby, of a part of him growing inside of her and connecting them forever, everything contributed to the immense pleasure he felt. It was not only physical, but also mental, and emotional. This was it. This was it for Michael. This was what he had always wanted.

Lisa reached down, fondling his testicles, then the base of his cock, squeezing, making him see stars.

“Fuck…”

“Michael… You feel so damn good… Don’t hold back…” she repeated.

“You sure…”

“Yeah… Just let go… Don’t be afraid…”

He glanced down at her, panting. Was he afraid? Oh hell yeah, he was. Terrified and thrilled. Something snapped in his mind.

As she still lay on her back, he just kept staring at her wordlessly and rose on his knees, grabbed a pillow, placing it under her ass, raising her hips, then brought her legs up and over his shoulders. The penetration became deeper and her eyes widened. She held onto his back, pulling him further into her.

“That’s it, baby… Fuck me. Fuck me, baby.”

The term of endearment was the last push, really. She felt tight and soft, the warm sinewy texture of hers seducing and tantalizing. Being on top of her this way, feeling her let go and trust him completely, did a number on him and he lifted his pelvis further, perfectly aligning his body with hers. Then he started to rock, and the slow burn of their previous dance became a passionate assault. The increased sensitivity, both physical and emotional, pushed them both to the brink of the precipice. Michael gritted his teeth as Lisa climaxed one more time, crying out, cursing, then calling out to him again.

“Baby… oh, shit! Oh, baby!”

It was too much. Too much to resist. He froze and she held him tight, feeling him engorge even more inside of her. Wanting to feel his release, needing it. He braced his hands on either side of her and his vision blurred as he let the heat of her body consume him. As he finally let go, erupting into her, she pulled his head down, swallowing his sobs with her kisses, holding him as he shook.

It seemed to go on forever. He felt delirious and dazzled. Feeling heavy and exhausted all of a sudden, he sunk down on the side and still she didn’t let go, holding onto him. Their fingers interlaced and her other hand cradled his face. Panting, she kissed him slowly. All the time in the world. Everything else forgotten for the time being. He was still inside of her and had no intention to pull out.

His breath was labored, and so was hers. Lisa opened her eyes and found his dark, soulful irises looking back at her. She kissed his forehead and he tipped her chin up, seeking her lips again.

“You good, baby girl?”

“Yeah… More than good… You gave me quite the pounding…”

Michael chuckled.

“Me? You almost fucked me into a coma…”

“Sorry… I thought you would keep up with a pregnant lady…”

Licking his lips, loving her taste on himself, he turned serious.

“I think I can keep up with you, yeah…”

She just watched him, her fingers now raking through his hair. She looked like she was debating whether she should speak her mind or not.

“Thank you… for this. You were right. I needed it.”

“What are you thanking me for? We both did. And I…” He just shook his head. “Please don’t regret what happened, Lisa.”

Her hands framed his face. Now her expression, too, turned very serious.

“I could never regret making love to you. Never. It doesn’t matter how fucked up we are.”

He blinked. “But are we, really? Fucked up, that is…”

Lisa didn’t reply. And he, too, wondered where that question had come from.

“I just want you to know, Michael, that I didn’t… You know, I haven’t been with anybody else either, since the last time we were together.”

“Why?” Barely a whisper. And yet she knew it was a legitimate question. She just shook her head.

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m just focusing on the baby… and myself.”

“Makes sense… And I think it’s fair.”

“You do?”

He loved how she kept stroking his hair as they spoke. So soothing. So calming. He never wanted this to end. Even better: he wanted all of this back, forever.

“Yeah. We are considerate parents after all…” Better to step back on safer grounds, at least for the time being. And Lisa understood. She rolled her eyes, smiling.

“Right… That’s your way to call this… agreement…”

One more kiss. He could not resist.

“Lisa… when are you leaving?”

She took a deep breath. “In a couple of days, I think. I wasn’t sure about your schedule. That’s why Danny will bring the kids back in a week. So… I guess I’ll have some time for myself when I get back home. Maybe I’ll even talk to my mother…”

Michael could recognize a chance when he saw one.

“In a week? Well, then why should you fly back so soon? I mean, you just got here. You could go to Tunis with me. Relax. Sunbathe… you love the sun. And vitamin D is great. Very important for you and the baby. You know I won’t be back to L.A. until January, Lise… That’s almost three whole months… a very long time…”

“You’re telling me that I should go to Tunis with you to sunbathe.” Her eyebrow rose.

“Yeah! Why not? Plus, we’d have more time to… you know… catch up and… stuff. Before I leave for Seoul.”

Say yes.

Lisa started smiling as he kept babbling, making up reasons why she should go with him as he spoke. He could tell that she was contemplating his offer.

“Catch up and stuff? Like being considerate parents?”

“I love being a considerate parent with you…”

“Uh-uhm…” She wiggled her hips and he winced. “I can feel that… Looks like you’re starting to be considerate all over again.”

Oh yeah. He could feel it too. Staying in her body like that indeed reduced his refractory period to… zero.

And so they went at it again. And then again, until she finally let sleep overcome her, her body half-draped over his torso. While Michael, well, he stayed awake until the sun rose above the horizon, afraid she would just disappear if only he closed his eyes. Afraid this was nothing but a dream.

 

 

 

 

At one point, as the sky finally let go of the darkness of the night and turned into an azure blanket studded with white, fluffy clouds, he kissed Lisa’s head one last time, disentangled himself from her embrace and went back to his penthouse. He wanted to call room service and have a nice breakfast ready for her, but he also wanted her to rest. She was out like a light. He decided that taking a long shower in his suite would be way safer, and that he would check on her in a little while.

As he stood under the hot water jet, he faintly heard his phone ringing. He just ignored it and relaxed, his eyes closed. He loved the soreness in his muscles. The tingling sensation of having been loved right. The sense of fulfillment and utter serenity that always accompanied nights like the one he had just shared with Lisa. He had almost forgotten how those moments of complete peace felt. In the past, before Lisa, he had gone through his fair share of one-night-stands with a few girls, but the gratification he would feel was nothing but physical. A good fuck was OK – but making love to someone he loved, reaching such unimaginable heights of pleasure, was something else entirely.

After the shower, he went into the living area and checked his phone. Three missed calls – all from Debbie.

Michael sighed. He wanted so much to know how her pregnancy was going, but at the same time, he wasn’t exactly excited at the idea of hearing from her. Plus, she had become way needier than he initially thought she would ever be, calling him every day, often for no reason at all, and sometimes even asking him if she could fly over, it didn’t matter where he was.

At first it had been cute. After a while, he had started to feel tangled in a spider web he had never noticed before. Its architecture was still quite a mystery to him, and he had no idea what else Debbie wanted from him. Her behavior seemed to have changed lately – she was starting to become someone he didn’t recognize.

While he was still debating whether he should call her back or not, his phone rang again. Of course, it was her. Michael bit his lips and took a deep breath.

“Hello?”

“Michael, good morning… where were you? I was starting to get worried. Why weren’t you answering your phone?”

He frowned. There was something in her tone, behind her typical casual, slightly mellifluous attitude. Why did he have to justify how he spent his time?

“I was busy. Is everything alright, Deb? Is the baby OK?”

“Oh yeah, the baby’s fine. I just wanted to hear your voice. See how you were, how work’s been going.”

OK… Michael’s frown intensified.

“I’m good, thanks. Are you in Los Angeles?”

“Yeah, I’m at one of my friends’ house. We’ve been talking about this baby, and how he’s going to change my life… and yours, of course.”

Right. The baby was definitely going to change their lives… only, in different ways.

Michael hoped she was talking about the pregnancy and delivery, and nothing more than that. But no, she had never expressed any intention or need in the parenting department. Per her own admission, Deborah wasn’t exactly fond of children and didn’t have any maternal instinct. But she loved Michael as a friend, and she had offered to be there for him to fulfill his desire to be a father. In exchange for money – which, business-wise, was only fair. She was a surrogate, and Michael was OK with it. He didn’t want anything else from her, no further involvement. And yet now, all of a sudden, there was an undertone that he felt he had to decipher.

“Are you talking about me with your friends?”

“Oh no, Michael. Don’t worry. You’re safe. I was just talking about my baby daddy… like, in general terms.”

“Alright… Well, I do hope you’re resting and eating well and taking your vitamins, Debbie.” He grinned.

“Of course I am. You know I take all this very seriously. I was just thinking… I do have your schedule right here, and I thought I could fly over to Tunis. So we can spend a few days together before you leave for Seoul.”

“Ah… Well, I don’t remember having planned anything like that.”

“No, you haven’t. We were supposed to meet in Australia next month. Which is fine. I mean, I can fly over there too. I do have friends in Sydney, and they can’t wait to see me. But since I haven’t seen you in a while, I just thought Tunis would be a great occasion.”

“Deb, I’m sorry, but I already have plans.”

She stayed quiet for a moment. When she spoke again, her tone didn’t sound cheerful any longer.

“Do your plans involve Lisa Marie?”

Michael’s eyes narrowed. His body tensed.

“Excuse me?”

“I asked you if your plans involve Lisa Marie. I know she’s there, Michael.”

“How do you know?”

“Well, you really don’t expect anything involving you or who’s around you to go unnoticed, do you?” She laughed. A curt, dry laugh. Michael gripped the phone tighter.

“Deb, I don’t know how you found out about Lisa, but honestly, I don’t see why you should care.”

“I don’t. But I do care about you. I just don’t want her to hurt you again, like she did in the past.”

Michael closed his eyes. Why, oh why had he told her about his marital problems during his procedures at Klein’s? Why hadn’t he listened to Lisa when she had said to him that whatever issues they had, outsiders couldn’t be trusted? But still… Debbie was not an outsider. She was not like everyone else. She was his friend. He trusted her enough to carry his child. Their agreement was transparent, crystal-clear. So why the sudden concern?

“Don’t you worry about that. Lisa and I are getting along just fine. Whatever problem we had in the past, we’ve been working on it for a while now.”

“What do you mean, Michael? Are you and Lisa back together?”

“Well, not really, but I do wanna make things right with her. She might go to Tunis with me. And then she’ll fly back to her kids. We just need some privacy… to sort some things out. I’m sorry, Deb. But you know what? I’ll see you in Sydney, I promise.”

“I thought it was over between the two of you…”

“Yeah, I thought so too. But things change. We’re considering giving it another try.” Well, that wasn’t exactly the truth, given the “considerate parents” stuff they had been engaging in, but he and Lisa had definitely gotten closer. And he needed a few more days with her. He hoped Deb would just let go.

“But why, Michael? You said you were just friends. And now you’re telling me you want to give it another try? Why now?”

“Because. Look, Debbie, I don’t think we should talk about this right now.” OK, now he was starting to get irked. He felt like she was trying to force him into a conversation he didn’t want to have. And he didn’t like feeling cornered. Debbie, of all people, should know that. Feeling cornered had been the reason why he had signed the damned divorce papers, although he had never really wanted to divorce Lisa.

“Well, we are talking about this. Are you sure it’s the right thing to do? I mean, shouldn’t you be focusing on your baby? On your tour? She’s not good for you. She’s going to mess up with your head again, Mike. Why now? What changed?”

He just wanted the phone call to be over. He spoke without even thinking.

“Because she was my wife, and I still love her. And because she’s pregnant, Debbie. Lisa, too, is pregnant with my child.”

 

 

 

 

When he went back to Lisa’s suite, he found the front door unlocked and opened it, without even knocking.

She was no longer in bed, sleeping. In fact, she was now wide awake, sitting on the couch, holding a cup of coffee in her hands. She looked freshly showered and oh, so beautiful. When he stepped into the living area, she smiled up at him and he felt part of the tension lingering after Debbie’s call slip away.

“Hey… Good morning.” She raked her fingers through her long hair and he noticed her cell phone on the coffee table. “I thought you had left.”

“I just needed a shower and I didn’t want to wake you up. By the way, breakfast will be here in ten minutes.”

His fingertips itched. He wanted to step closer, hold her, kiss her. But he couldn’t. They were back on friendly territory. And although something in her eyes had definitely changed, as if she had dropped her guard a little bit, he still knew the boundaries of their new, very fragile relationship. He walked over to her and just kissed her forehead. Her hand came up and rested on the side of his face for a moment.

“Really? Then we’re gonna have a second breakfast. I called room service a minute ago.”

Michael chuckled and stepped back, sitting on the Ottoman across the coffee table.

“Well, in this case, I can only hope you worked up an appetite…”

Lisa’s gaze dropped and she smirked, her eyes lost in thought for a moment.

“I sure did…”

“Cool…” He cleared his throat. “I gotta admit, I’m a bit hungry myself.”

Her smile widened and she glanced up at him, her blue-green eyes almost shy behind her long eyelashes.

“You are? Good. I love it when you put some more meat on your bones…” Her tone was playful. They got lost in each other’s eyes for a moment, both wondering how all this should play out. It was new – unfamiliar, in a way. But also uncontaminated by any bullshit.

“Lise -”

“Mike…”

He nodded his head and cleared his throat again.

“I’m sorry. You go.”

“OK. Look – about your offer. I thought about it. I’m going to Tunis with you… if we think we can make these new boundaries work… and if you still think it’s a good idea, that is.”

Finally some good news.

“I think it’s a great idea!”

“Alright. I had to call my mother and let her know that I won’t be back until next week. We had a business meeting planned in four days. Of course, she nagged at me about being unreliable when it comes to… well, everything that involves her. Which might even be true. And then she asked me why I decided to stay.”

“OK…” Michael stared at her, cautiously. “And? What did you tell her?”

“Well, like I said, I had planned to tell her about my pregnancy once I was back in L.A., but I realized that I feel way safer here than I’d ever do by having to talk to her face to face. And that this way, she might even have a few days to get used to the idea and… you know… decompress.”

“So you told her now…”

Gosh. Why were they both already paying with so much headache the first happy, fulfilling, meaningful moments they had in months?

“Yeah.” She tried to decode the expression on his face. “Are you mad I did?”

“What? No!” He just shrugged. “Why should I be mad… I don’t care what she thinks. In fact, I am glad you told her. Because I’m here, if you need, you know, support or… anything.” Secretly, he had been worried stiff that Priscilla would try to manipulate the whole situation and turn Lisa against him again, hadn’t he been there.

“OK…”

“What did she say?”

“Nothing. I think she almost fainted.”

“Either she was overjoyed or…” He had to smirk.

She, too, was repressing a chuckle. “I don’t think she was all that happy, Michael…”

He took a deep breath and scratched his stubbly chin.

“And how does that make you feel?”

Her eyes were bright and serene.

“I don’t give a flying fuck. It’s our baby, not hers.”

Well, maybe the day had the potential to get better, after all.