Unraveling – Chapter 16

Chapter 16 – Resolve

There had been so many occasions that had reminded Lisa that no other man but Michael would ever do. Each and every single one of those times had been unsettling in so many ways. On the one hand, they would grant her a momentary peace of mind. On the other hand, they would make her feel on edge, petrified even: what would she do if, at one point, he simply cut her off? If he didn’t want to see her anymore…

If not for a short period of time during their painful divorce – when Michael had shunned her and pretended for months that she had never been in his life at all – he had never done anything like that. He had never really behaved that way. He could be evanescent but never completely absent. Lisa would always know where to find him and he would always have his ways to reel her back in. Sometimes he didn’t have to do anything. The fact that he existed in the same world where she lived was enough.

It had happened countless times. Now, all of a sudden and completely out of the blue, one specific occasion resurfaced in her mind.

It had been before the trial and before the allegations, and she was still married to Nic back then. Of course, things weren’t going well with him at all, and Lisa already knew that the wedding had been nothing but a knee-jerk reaction to much more profound issues that plagued her. A band-aid on a wound that just would not stop bleeding.

But anyway, she had been still trying to keep up the charade somehow. The day before, she and Nic had slept together. It had been quite a disappointing experience both on a physical and emotional level. Later that night, Lisa had felt under the weather, as if she was coming down with something nasty. Good thing she had never lived with her current husband, since she didn’t want him to see her like that. He didn’t need any more clues about how badly their relationship was crumbling.

Leish had been at the house when Lisa had stormed to the bathroom, feeling nauseous and dizzy. She had observed her friend as she doubled over and knelt before the toilet.

“Are you sure you’re not pregnant?”

Lisa had felt as if she was about to throw up, but it hadn’t happened. However, she had decided to stay there for a while – just in case.

“No… It’s not that. I’m on the pill and he used precautions. I just am not feeling 100%. I think I might have caught that bug that’s been going ‘round.”

Leish had snorted.

“Yeah, I bet.”

Oh, she knew that there was no bug going around at all. Leish was aware that Lisa likely felt the way she felt because of what she would call “the pull”. But denial could be strong, at times.

“Leish, it’s definitely not what you think it is, I guarantee you.”

Leish’s gray eyes had stared at her while the rest of her body too remained perfectly still. Just leaning against the door frame. Feeling as if she was being body-scanned, Lisa had averted her gaze.

Then her friend had walked over and had sat down on the floor, taking Lisa’s hands in her own in a comforting, empathetic gesture.

“This ain’t you. I mean, it is kinda you because you are a darn bonehead and even your body gotta react to that stubbornness at one point. So what I’m saying is that you feeling a bit rough has nothing to do with being ill at all.” She had sighed. “Just go to him, Lise. Talk to him… Or whatever. I don’t like it when you’re down like this.”

“I don’t need to talk to Nic.”

“I mean Michael. And you know it.”

“Not a chance in the world, Leish. Michael and I are done and have been for quite some time. The way I feel has nothing to do with him.”

Of course, it was just undiluted bullshit and later that night, tipsy and with her inhibitions catastrophically lowered, Lisa had shown up at his ranch unannounced. The guards at the gates had let her in after a phone call that had maybe lasted three seconds. Nobody from Michael’s security detail – or anyone else, for that matter – had appeared when she had parked the car right in front of his two-story private quarters. It was pretty obvious that the staff had become used to this game as well.

The lights in the house were on and Lisa had felt like crying. Desperate and relieved at the same time.

Before she could even reach out for the doorbell, Michael had opened the door. Just standing there, looking tired and majestic as usual – his black shirt half out of his pants, his hair a mess. He had the face of someone who hadn’t slept well in quite some time and had stared at Lisa with a quizzical expression.

She could tell that he was mildly surprised to see her there, but not completely caught off guard.

“Took you long enough to show up again… How long since our last encounter? Couple of months?”

Lisa had hated his cocky tone. If a part of her had wished that he would welcome her by telling her that he loved her to pieces, that he had missed her as much as she had missed him, at this point she had become pretty good at shutting it up quietly. Michael, this Michael, was no longer the man she had been married to a lifetime ago. He could be passionate but remote, open and yet mistrusting. And he would only seldom give her the emotional reassurance that she needed. That sense of stability that was such a pivotal part of her overall wellbeing was missing. At times, she felt as if she was in love with a stranger… Or someone vaguely familiar at best.

“Are you complaining? You should have called me if you wanted to see me.”

Realizing that she still hadn’t sobered up fully, she had tried hard not to sway as she tossed her hair in quite a defiant way.

“And you should have done the same, instead of dropping by without notice. I could have been in good company, you know.”

Strangling him had suddenly become a tempting option. Her immediate reaction had been fueled by the last drop of pride she had left… And by the mental image of Michael screwing some nameless woman. The idea of someone else hearing those sexy little sounds he would always make during sex, imagining him holding onto someone else’s body as he got swept away by pleasure – it all felt much more painful than Lisa was willing to admit.

“You know what? You’re right, Michael.” She had turned, ready to go back to her car. Feeling like the stupidest bitch on the planet. Why did she still subject herself to this? He obviously couldn’t care less. “Good night… And fuck off. Or fuck whoever you want, any way you want. Not me, anyway. See if I care from now on.”

Of course, their well-trained routine had involved him not even allowing her to move a second step away from him. He had grabbed her by her arm, spun her around as if she was nothing but a rag doll, and dragged her into his apartment, kicking the door shut.

Then they had been all over each other, right away.

When he had first kissed her, Lisa had tasted wine on his tongue and that detail and whipped her even more into a frenzy. It looked like she and Michael still moved on parallel routes. They could still be in sync, it didn’t matter how much they refused to acknowledge it.

He had pushed her against the door and his breath was already ragged. He had started to undress her in a hurry as they kept kissing like maniacs. They were both starving for one another. Reaching down, she had found him hard and ready and her knees had about given in.

God… she loved him so much. And he could hurt her so bad. He could have her eating from the palm of his hand whenever he wanted, and the realization both shocked her and infuriated her. His charm would never, ever fail.

While he removed her shirt with a grunt and almost ripped her bra off, Lisa had managed to pry his fly open, unbutton his pants and pull his dick out. Glancing down, she had loved to discover that he still reacted to her touch like he had always done. Magic. At least part of the effect they had on each other was more balanced out, whenever they were about to fuck.

Michael’s head too had dropped, following her gaze. He had taken her hand and had rested it on himself, he had watched her small fingers close around him. Then he had covered her hand with his own, guiding her movements.

“See what you do to me? What you still do to me?” He had winched. “Ah… God. That’s it… Fucking… hell…”

She had seen him swallow hard, and his eyes – for just a second – had shown all the tenderness and vulnerability that his actions and words tried so desperately to disprove.

Lisa had pulled her own panties down with her free hand and had wiggled out of them – never leaving him. Grabbing her by the back of her neck, Michael had kissed her again, hard, then had picked her up, once again pushing her forcefully against the door. Her legs had closed around his waist and she had guided him to her center, still kissing him with a passion that could no longer be restrained.

He hadn’t been gentle. He had not entered slowly, making her feel every inch of his love for her like he would usually do when they were at peace. This was a war. He had taken her there and then with a strong, upward thrust, forcing a cry out of her. And also quietly telling her how much he longed for her.

Of course, it had been the usual mixture of pain and soul-shattering pleasure, and Lisa had welcomed it in its totality. The absolute annihilation of all senses. Because in the end, there was nothing that could be compared to the way he loved her.

When he had started to move, fucking her hard against that door, she had held onto him and had responded to each and every thrust. Feeling complete again, if only for one night. If only for one moment. She was finally home, and Michael was giving her what her body had needed all along. What her soul had been craving.

Whatever she had done before with any other man had just stopped existing and Lisa had reveled in the feeling of finally being where she was supposed to be all along. She had pushed the guilt of betraying her own most intimate feelings and desires away. But she had not been able to stop the words silently replaying in her mind: one day, the bad choices she kept making would end up burning her for real.

“What are you thinking? Lise… Stay with me…”

Back in the here and now, Lisa’s eyes focused on Michael’s face.

How different he looked now. And it wasn’t just because of the short hair and that neat beard that he had been sporting for a couple of years now. He was a different man altogether, she could tell.

And he was her husband again. Back at being the gentle, infuriatingly beautiful soul she had always known.

“Nothing… I’m here. With you. I was just thinking that maybe that tornado wiped away some of our bullshit too…” She smiled at him, very softly and once again she touched his face. “’Cause look at that… we’re finally talking…”

He seemed to relax a bit.

“Yeah… And I am loving every minute of it.”

She was glad that he seemed at least a little more relieved. She had seen his struggle, as he fought so hard to finally give voice to all the quiet thoughts that had been plaguing his mind for so long. She knew how difficult it was for him to find the right words, or the right timing. Exhausting, really. Michael, so talented when expressing the most universal feelings through his songs and dance, had never been very skilled at explaining himself in private.

And yet she had learned to decipher his unique language and saw the sincerity of the moment they had been sharing.

Right now, she could see that he was barely keeping it together and she felt immense empathy for him. For the first time since this disaster had occurred, Lisa truly saw the toll that the event had taken on him. He was so scared to lose her, to lose their family. She was too. Why had they never talked about it? Why was it so difficult to say it out loud, even now? That they were both stretched so thin that they could break at any moment.

Unless… Unless they really forgave themselves. And each other.

It was long overdue. They could not fix the past, but they could do something to stop their previous mistakes from affecting their today and their tomorrow. It was a challenging task for sure, but trying was the only option they had left. Lisa knew what life without Michael felt like. It was like mourning a part of herself for eternity. She didn’t want to feel that way ever again.

“Mike…”

“Yes…”

“Take me upstairs. I need to make love to you…”

He blinked, and something moved in his eyes. Lisa knew what it was – it had been so long since he had heard her say those words. Without breaking eye contact, he rose onto his knees and picked her up, bridal-style, then stood up effortlessly.

It was her turn to do this now, and all of a sudden it all became as clear as the sun. He had hurt her badly, yes, but he also had been desperately trying to fix it. And even though Lisa too had stayed, and had tried, she knew that she had held part of herself back – hindering him in the process. Swaying back and forth between hope of a brighter present, a happier future, and the disillusionment of everything that had gone wrong. She could no longer do that. If she really wanted she and Michael to last, she too had to take a stand and hold onto her decision as fiercely as she could.

And so she did.

When she finally made peace with what she had known all along – that her lack of surprise about what Michael had done stemmed from her preexisting knowledge that he had been going through a crisis for quite some time, and she had not found the resources to truly help him – reacting became easier. She no longer felt stuck between wanting to forgive him and – deep down – wanting to castrate him. Lisa realized that she had forgiven him.

She loved him to pieces. That had never changed. But she had observed him as he slowly drifted away and she had done nothing, if not hoping that he would come back to her on his own. Too scared to act, too terrified of doing something that would push him even further away, too preoccupied with pretending that everything was fine. Even though she knew that it wasn’t. Fear could be that paralyzing. And that dangerous.

Well, she was finally done with her own duplicity. She was tired of fighting what she wanted. Despite being aware that this conversation was not the end but the beginning, she now knew what needed to be done.

Lisa kept kissing him as he slowly walked up the stairs and toward the bedroom that they had shared for the past couple of nights. She kissed his face, his neck, his lips. She explored him with her fingertips. She allowed her whole body to revel in the feeling of being held by him. His perfect dancer body – lean, strong, healthy. His soul finally recovering from a recoil that could have been lethal in different circumstances. No, she was not going to let that happen. She was going to protect him, like she had planned to do all along. It didn’t matter how extenuating it could be at times.

Still holding her, Michael stopped at the foot of the bed and kept kissing her for a very long time. How gentle, passionate and emotionally present her king was, compared to the lover she had shared her bed with countless times in the past, when they were supposed to be nothing but bitter ex-partners. The difference was palpable.

Slowly he put her down, then began to undress her. His mouth never left her. Her lips, her neck, the soft slope of her shoulder and breasts as he discovered more naked skin. Lisa sighed, vibrating like a diapason under his touch. From the way he took his time, she could tell that he wanted to build the anticipation and that he needed this to last.

The same thing had happened the night before, and yet this was so very different from the furious fucking they had bestowed upon each other. What had once been about claiming had now turned into reconnecting on a much deeper level.

But there was also something else. The previous night, Michael had taken the lead – pretty much for the entire time, after she had kicked off their intimate moment in that bathroom. Each of his kisses and thrusts had told Lisa how much he still wanted her. The burden of proving the depth of their bond had been entirely on him. And she needed for this to be different. She would do everything in her power to make sure that he never desired sexual healing with another woman – ever again.

With immense difficulty, she broke the kiss.

“Wait… I want to take care of you…”

Her eyes tethered to his, she smiled and saw him relax. Michael took a deep breath and just stayed there, waiting. Watching her just stand in front of him wearing just her sexy bra and panties.

“You are so beautiful, Lise…”

She stepped closer and into his personal space again.

“So are you, baby… So are you.”

His shirt was already unbuttoned and she took it off, then she got rid of the t-shirt he wore underneath. She observed him. His torso naked, that bulge in his pants, his chest rising and falling rapidly. She had to close her eyes for a second and swallow.

Her fingertips rediscovered him slowly, following the route of his muscles. Her lips traced the same pattern. His collarbone, his throat, his chest, his flat stomach. She started taking care of his pants.

“Oh, baby… Look at that… Let me help you out, here…”

Michael sighed again and tried to speed up the process. His hands were shaking and she took care of the job at his place, sitting at the foot of the bed while she lowered his pants. Her hand ran over his penis, still forced in the tight confines of his underwear. She glanced up at him and smiled again.

“It almost feels like the first time, doesn’t it?”

He just nodded his head and, once again, remained perfectly still. Relinquishing his power was not something that came easy to him, especially in bed, yet with Lisa he had always been able to do it. In the right conditions. When their connection was strong, unbreakable. When their mutual trust was wholly there.

She pushed his briefs down, helped him get rid of every piece of clothing that he was still wearing until he was fully naked, and all the while she caressed his body. She held his penis in her hand for a moment, feeling it engorge even more in her grip as she kissed his pelvic bone with slow, open-mouthed kisses. God… there was nothing she wouldn’t do for him at this moment. Nothing she wouldn’t let him do to her. And it felt so wonderful.

“What about you… You’re still way overdressed for what I have in mind…”

Michael’s voice was husky and low. Strained. Something that she had always found hard to resist.

“Oh, don’t worry…” Half-heartedly, she let go of him and stood up. “I got this too.”

She began unclasping her bra and Michael, at first nothing but a silent observed, soon joined the fun. He too moved slowly, unhurriedly, until the redundant garment fell to the floor. Despite their useless mad dash out of the house, earlier that morning, they now acted as if they had all the time in the world. And maybe it was just like that.

Backing off ever so slightly, his gaze moved to her naked breasts, to her panties, then up to her face again. He cocked his head to a side and didn’t say a word.

One hand holding onto his neck, Lisa let the other travel down her belly and into her underwear. Staring at him as she bit her lip, she breached the barrier and began touching herself. Loving the feeling of his eyes on her.

Just the thought of being observed by him almost set her off. This was the unbridled passion she had been looking for, the one that Michael had made her taste again and again only a few hours earlier. And yet it felt new.

Her body reacted to her own touch and she moaned in anticipation, knowing what would come next, throwing her head back. She didn’t see the look on his face changing and the clouds that had been obfuscating his mind disappearing. Finally – and gloriously.

Michael just stared at her, taking her all in. Feeling reborn and replenished like never before. The wound on his arm was forgotten. Every single sensation was centered in the pit of his stomach. He recognized it in the bat of an eyelid: he was in love. He was completely and desperately in love with the woman standing in front of him, pretty much naked. Lisa was able to create emotions so strong in him, that he would always be uncontrollably addicted to being with her and only her. Nobody else existed.

The man that had kissed another woman, the guy who had been so confused, so trapped in his own mind to the point of not being able to extricate himself from the tentacles holding him prisoner… That guy was no longer there. He was gone. The moment Michael realized that Lisa had finally stopped fighting off whatever restraint had held her back until that moment, he too felt liberated. Relieved. Forgiven. Whole again.

And now, this. She was seducing him… Would she ever realize how little effort it took her, to unleash the panther in him? Oh, he would make sure to let her know all about that in a minute.

His eyes followed the outline of her small fingers through the light fabric of her panties as she played with herself for him to watch her. He fought the urge to jump her bones and waited for her to open her eyes again – then he reached down for himself. She emitted a soft whimper and her fingers dipped into her own heat for a moment, about making him lose it there and then. But no. He would drag this out as long as he saw fit. And if she wanted to be the one in control for a while, maybe he would let her.

Despite the gentle unraveling of their intimate reconnection, there was something so primal, so brutal and determined in the way they were finally confronting what was still a difficult situation. He had been so insecure, even the night before. So worried to discover that Lisa had become emotionally detached from him, it didn’t matter how primed her body was. However, by looking at her it became apparent that the storm of addictive passion that had always marked their relationship had somehow been reignited thoroughly. It was scary how little it took for such unique chemistry to get tilted off its axis. How boredom, routine and too many unsaid words could soil such perfection.

But maybe… Just maybe, his words had finally worked.

Michael desperately tried to stay in the moment and focused on Lisa’s eyes on him. They were sparkling, her cheeks were reddened and her lips parted. She was still touching herself, following the rhythm of his own play because she had always loved to watch him do this. They had been so kinky and audacious in the past, but too many times lately they had slipped into some dangerous sexual routine. Trapped in their own fears.

He wondered if the Christine debacle had also happened because his self-consciousness and insecurities had kicked in before he could ever do anything to stop them. If the fear of having become undesirable and unattractive for his wife had pushed him toward another woman, threatening to inflict a potential, disastrous blow to his marriage.

It didn’t matter how many justifications Lisa had tried to come up with and how much of a burden she was willing to carry. Michael knew that his actions were on him, and him alone. He had been in the eye of the storm. He had been the storm.

And that remained true even if he and Lisa had possibly created the perfect recipe for disaster the moment they had started taking each other for granted. Why not, after all? They had gotten married again, had made their beautiful baby boy. He was finally being left alone, knock on wood. Nothing and nobody was trying to separate them, like it had happened the first time. The survival mode was no longer necessary because everything was virtually perfect. And so perhaps, without even knowing, two people who had never stopped loving each other had become their own secret enemies. Unwillingly, he and Lisa had gotten caught in some sort of dangerous inside job, in some mystification of how a healthy relationship was supposed to work.

“I love you.”

Her words reeled him back and he found her eyes. Her hand was still buried in her panties, but her fingers had stilled their movements.

“I want you to know that this wasn’t planned at all, Michael. This is just me. I need to make love to you because your words made a difference… and because I just am so overwhelmed by the intensity of what I feel right now. I can’t help it.”

“So… you’re saying that you’re not really trying to seduce me?”

She smiled and bit her lip.

“I am totally trying to seduce you.”

He had to smile.

“I love you too, Lise… I really do.”

“I know.” Her soft smile was one of absolute serenity. So sincere and comforting. “I feel it. I feel you.”

He closed the small distance separating them and took her in his arms. Just holding her for a moment, trying to ignore the marvelous sensation of her perfect little body rubbing against him. Just enjoying the tenderness of that intimate contact.

“God, I’m so glad we drove back here… So glad we still have time.”

“Indeed…” Placing her hands on his chest, she pushed him on the bed suddenly. “And since we do… Let me show you what I wanna do with all this time…”

She slowly crawled on top of him and kissed him. Michael’s hands immediately tangled in her long hair, pushing it back as he fully engaged in the kiss. Loving the feeling of her tongue in his mouth, caressing, seducing. Slowly but surely, they were starting to heal and he opened his eyes slightly, watching her face relax in complete abandon.

And then her kisses descended on his chest, her fingers traced the lines of his pectoral and abdominal muscles. She slid down his body in one slow, smooth movement, coming to rest between his legs.

Looking up at him, she allowed him to see what was there. Desire, yes, lust and love, of course. But also something else. Any fear that had crippled her seemed to have melted away and was now replaced by newfound confidence.

“Lise… Don’t you ever… ever think that you’re undesirable to me… Or boring… I… Oh, shit…”

Leaning up on his elbows, he watched her as she took him in her mouth. Again, this felt a deja-vu of the night before, yet Michael knew it was an entirely different scenario. She had at first slapped him and then claimed him, taken him with fury and anger and desperation, while now the feeling was somehow divergent. He felt wanted, desired, and needed so badly that it became instantly intoxicating, in a manner that was beyond intense. The pure ecstasy painted on her face, as she slowly sucked on him, hid no trace of pain whatsoever. Quite the opposite, as a matter of fact. She was relaxed, enthusiastic and was reminding him what he had never experienced with anybody else.

Her hands joined her mouth – one closing around his steel, the other fondling and massaging his testicles – and he was glad that they were in the privacy of their bedroom. He started making sounds that he himself hadn’t heard in quite some time, knowing well that every moan, every groan and every grunt turned her on even more. If that was even possible.

“Oh, baby… Yeah… Good girl… God… damn it.”

The moment she focused on the tip of his penis, he was forced to grit his teeth to not come. His hand came to rest on her head, raking her hair back as he kept watching her tease the most sensitive part of him with no hurry at all. She was being gentle, delicate, almost – and so thoughtful, alternating light touches of her tongue with much more intense movements. When once again she took as much as she could of him in her mouth, his hips engaged in the dance and she did that little thing – that purr – that would always manage to get him crazy with desire.

God, he was going to come. She was going to make sure that he would succumb to her unquestionable power using only her mouth and hands. But he didn’t want this to end so quickly…

He closed his fist in her hair and she understood, letting go of him slowly, then looking up at him again.

“You don’t know what it does to me to taste you… How addicted I am to your body, your skin… Your heart. It’s sick how much I want you… And I’m so fucking tired to pretend I don’t…”

“Then stop doing it… Don’t ever do it again.” Sitting up, he grabbed her by the shoulders and brought her up to his mouth, kissing her like a madman. “Come here…”

Rolling over, he came to rest on top of her. Lisa laughed huskily, her hands holding his head, her fingers sinking in his hair.

“You are such a bad, bad boy… I thought I was the one leading this game…”

He smirked. Were they… playing? Like in the good old times?

“Maybe in a little bit.” Shifting slightly until he was on his side, he just observed her carefully as his hand caressed her breasts, played with her nipples, skimmed over the flat surface of her belly, her perfect thighs and finally came to rest over her center. Her skin was boiling hot and she was panting. “For now… Tell me how you feel, baby girl. Tell me what it feels like.”

Lisa’s upper body arched just as her legs parted. She opened herself up to him completely as they kissed. Tasting himself on her tongue made him go even crazier with lust and he began to tease her gently, using just the tips of his fingers. Her hips shot up and she broke the kiss.

“…Wanted… I feel wanted,” she panted.

Michael smiled, softly.

“You are…”

His fingers entered in a slow, deliberate motion and she moaned out loud, then kissed him again. It was so hard to leave her mouth, but he needed to rediscover her thoroughly and so he broke the contact, his lips finding her neck, her collarbone, her breasts. Her lower body began to tremble and he kept moving slowly, until she came long and hard against his hand. All the while, she reached down, grasped him and began to caress him as she told him, once again, how much she loved him. How much she needed him.

Michael’s arousal was reaching levels of sheer insanity – he just couldn’t get enough of her, now that he finally felt that she was fully back. He needed to taste her, make her his again, being reminded where his home was. Scooting down, he replaced his fingers with his mouth and didn’t let up until she came again. He knew that she felt powerful when she teased and pleasured him, but he too loved having her come undone against his tongue.

God, he had always been so hot for this woman. He wondered why, too many times, she had doubted him.

Of course, he had broken the rules and had managed to be obedient only for a little while. But Lisa could not complain, really. When Michael decided that it was his turn to take the lead, she would always know that she was in for a treat. And treated her he had, to the point that, when he finally snuggled up against her again, she was breathless and dizzy.

And maybe, just maybe, this was the way all this was supposed to go down. Not her possessing him and not him possessing her, but both of them swinging between submission and dominance, pleasuring each other in ways that made them feel equal in all the senses that counted.

He held her from behind, one arm around her neck, his hand resting on his breast, while his other hand took its time caressing her lower belly, her thighs. She turned her head and they kissed for the longest time, until she was finally able to recover. She wanted to tell him how powerful and feminine she had felt earlier, when she had pushed him on the bed and had shown him what a difference an honest, open conversation could make. How she would have loved to have him come in her mouth, how the experience of seeing him lose his mind was always of pure, brain-melting pleasure for her.

“Just so you know… We’re not done.”

“Oh, I can tell…”

His erection pressing against her side was hard to miss.

“In fact, I don’t think I’ll ever be done with you.”

How did he manage to be both so sexy and so fucking endearing at the same time? She pulled his head down and they resumed kissing, and when she moved, he allowed her to once again push him back against the mattress. He let her body come to rest half on top of him as her hand kept stroking him with increasing determination.

Michael groaned and she broke the kiss, panting. Her eyes drowned into his.

“I want you so much it hurts… Always, always you baby. That has never changed.”

She kept caressing and fondling him and he was almost forced to glance down, at her hand on him. What he saw turned him on to no end and he was hit by that unbreakable chemical reaction that had always bonded he and Lisa to one another, since the very first time they had made love. He was devoted to her. Lust-filled. He was in love and the sheer realization of the intensity of his feelings almost brought tears to his eyes.

How close had he been to lose her? If he had continued. If he hadn’t stopped. If he hadn’t broken free from his own chains. Only the moment he had been able to do that, he had realized that Lisa had been waiting for him with her arms wide open. She had been waiting for him to return to her all along.

And he… Well, he had done the same one too many times in the past. He had waited even when it was time to act. It finally occurred to him that this was no longer about returning. It was all about staying.

They rolled over on the bed and he was on top of her. Unlike the night before, when he had mostly taken her from behind, with a fury that had felt foreign even to him, he now needed to feel one with her. To feel safe and trusted, to be seen. And to see all of her.

Lisa opened her legs and he ground against her center, watching her body writhe and arch again in pleasure. Reaching down, he guided himself inside her heat and the first contact forced him to close his eyes. Such was the intensity of it. He moved slowly, savoring the sweet torture of sliding into her soft, tight body.

He felt everything. The skin-on-skin contact, the scent of her skin and her hair, her eyes searching his face. This was so much more than the mere closeness of two bodies. This was eroticism in its purest form.

He wrapped her leg around his hip as he finally entered her fully, making her moan, then he stilled.

She touched his face, closed her fingers in his hair on the back of his head, kissed his chin, then gently caressed his ear with her lips.

“Please, move…”

Her whisper was almost inaudible, but Michael heard it and felt it.

He kissed her again, gently, and all the while she pulled her pelvis up just a little bit. Just enough to have him grind against her as he began to slide into her with slow, determined thrusts. The friction was so delicious that they both started to moan almost in unison, and all the while their eyes stayed connected. He watched her throw her head back in uncontrollable bliss, her hand reaching down again, touching him and herself in the process as she climaxed.

“Shit… yeah… That’s it, baby girl. Come for me. God… you are so gorgeous… You’re perfect…”

He needed to be careful. Just looking at her being so uninhibited was doing something to him. Something that he couldn’t explain and that he thought he had forgotten. He needed to move things along, to do something to tame this madness. He needed more control. He kissed and bit down on her breasts and Lisa seemed to come again, and she was everywhere. She was everything.

“Fuck me… Fuck me hard, daddy. Oh, God… I can’t stand it…”

Gritting his teeth, he moved onto a kneeling position and put her legs over his shoulders. He didn’t speed up the pace to rush for an orgasm – quite the opposite. He slowed down once again, but his thrusts became even more vigorous, the penetration even deeper. He never stopped watching her. The way the muscles of her abdomen contracted, the way her perfect breasts bounced slightly every time he drove into her, the way she reached back with one hand, holding onto the headboard, as her other hand clung to his ass.

Just looking at how she responded to his passionate assault, Michael knew that she was trying to pull him in and desperately tried to resist just a little longer. Taking both her arms, he raised them above her head. He held onto her wrists with one hand while the other caressed her face, his fingertips skimming over the perfect lines of her lips as he kept his rhythm slow, powerful, controlled. Lisa took his fingers into her mouth, sucked them, and her eyes half-opened. What he saw made his soul take a leap. He felt the vortex approaching and knew that the fire would consume him.

He removed his fingers from her mouth and kissed her.

“I feel you… Let me touch you… Let me make you come…”

Lisa’s order was issued with the sweetest tone imaginable and Michael immediately complied. Almost out of his own volition, he surrendered to her. He let go of her hands knowing well that she would be the end of him. And the beginning.

Immediately she grabbed his ass and pulled him into her. Once, twice, as she moaned, as her muscles fluttered around him and he was lost. There was nothing that he could do to stop it and he began to come hard as she stared at him. He knew that he was loud as he spilled into her over and over again. He knew that he climaxed so hard that at one point he thought he would never stop. He knew they were both saved.

Afterward, he sunk against her body and loved the feeling of her arms closing around him, holding him, her caresses on the sweaty skin of his back, her soft lips kissing and nibbling at his neck. No other woman but her had ever made him feel accepted and loved exactly for who he was. He and Lisa were cuddling, and Michael had almost forgotten how peaceful, how perfect everything was in moments like these.

“God… This was…”

“…I know…”

“Are you alright?”

“More than alright… You almost killed me with all that love, daddy… Or brought me back to life…”

Her sensual purr made him smile.

“Yeah? Get ready for round two, then…”

“Hold your horses… I think I need a break… It was all… ah, pretty intense.”

He nipped at her naked shoulder, making her squeal.

“Don’t complain.”

“I’m not. I’m just giving your sexy self some time to recover. I don’t want you to leave this bed anytime soon.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”

“Amazing…”

She searched his lips and kissed him. Slowly, thoroughly. Her legs still locked around him didn’t give him a chance to pull out. And he didn’t want to, anyway, since he loved how cozy and warm he felt inside of her. Plus, her relaxed, playful, sensual demeanor was such an irresistible mix.

“Honestly, though… Whenever you do that, I come super quickly.”

Lisa laughed, huskily.

“What? When I grab your ass and pull you into me?”

“Uh-uhm…”

If once upon a time it had kind of miffed him, to admit that she held such power over him, it was nice to say it out loud now. He wanted her to be sure of the effect she had on him. She – and no other woman but her.

“Good thing then that I waited for you to be right on the finish line before doing it…” One more kiss, her fingers tangled in his hair, messing him all up even more, her body still holding him inside. “Besides… I love to make you lose control…” Her lips skimmed his ear once again, whispering. “…I love to feel you come inside of me… It’s sexy…”

His hips moved and she whimpered.

Yeah… she was right. It was sexy – and to be so open was even sexier.

To be like that reminded Michael of how many times in the past they had stayed connected for the longest time after making love, enjoying the intimate closeness that always accompanied their post-orgasmic bliss. Just to start again a few minutes later.

Time stood still.